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Llama: Carl! There is a dead human in our house!

Carl: Oh..hey..how did he get here?

Llama: Caaaaarl! What did you dooo?

Carl: Me? uh..I didnt do this!

Llama: Explained what happened Carl!

Carl: I've never seen him before in my life!

Llama: Why did you kill this person Carl?

Carl: I do not kill people..that is..that is my least favourite thing to do..

Llama: Tell me Carl, exactly what you were doing before I came home.

Carl: Alright..well, I was upstairs..

Llama: Okay?

Carl: I was uh..sitting in my room...

Llama: Yes..?

Carl: Reading a book..

Llama: Go on...

Carl: And, uh... well this guy walked in...

Llama: Okay?

Carl: So I went up to him..

Llama: Yes...

Carl: And I..I stabbed him 37 times in the chest.

Llama: Caaaaaaaaarl! That kills people!!

Carl: Oh, well, I didnt know that.

Llama: How could you not know that!

Carl: Yeah, I'm in the wrong here. I suck!

Llama: What happened to his hands?

Carl: What's that?

Llama: His hands. Why-why are they missing?

Carl: Well, I kind of um, cooked them up. And ate them.

Llama: Caaaaaaaaaarrrll!!!

Carl: I was hungry. And well, you know, when you crave hands...

Llama: Why on earth would you do that?

Carl: I was hungry for hands! Gimmie a break!

Llama: Caaaaaaarl!!!

Carl: My stomach was making the rumblies...

Llama: Caaarl!

Carl: That only hands could satisfy!

Llama: What is wrong with you Carl!

Carl: Well, I kill people and I eat hands, that's two things!

If I have missed anything out, feel free to correct me :)

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12y ago
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Anonymous

Lvl 1
3y ago
the other llamas name is paul
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13y ago

Llama: Carl! What on earth was all that?
CARL: I'm not sure what you're referring to.
Llama: You sunk an entire cruise ship, Carl!
CARL: Are you sure that was me? I, I would think I'd remember something like that.
Llama: Carl, I watched you fire a harpoon into the captain's face!
CARL: That sounds dangerous.
Llama: You were headbutting children off the ship!
CARL: That, uh... that must've been horrifying to watch!
Llama: Then you started making out with the ice sculptures!
CARL: Well, thank God that the children weren't on board to see it.
Llama: Uhh.. Carl why is the lifeboat all red and sticky?
CARL: Well I guess you could say it is red and sticky.
Llama: Caaarl, what are we standing in?
CARL: Would you believe it's strawberry milkshake?
Llama: No! I would not believe that!
CARL: Uhh, melted gumdrops?
Llama: No.
CARL: Boat nectar?
Llama: No.
CARL: Some of God's tears?
Llama: Tell me the truth Carl.
CARL: Fine. - It's the lovely elderly couple from 2B.
Llama: CAAARL!
CARL: Well they were, uh, they were taking all the croissant rolls.
Llama: I can't believe what I'm hearing!
CARL: I will not apologize for art.
Llama: Where are the other lifeboats?
CARL: Whoa! You won the prize, I didn't even notice that.
Llama: Where are the other lifeboats, Carl?
CARL: Looking at the trajectory of the moon and the sun, probably at the bottom of the
ocean. I bit lots of holes in them.
Llama: CARL!
CARL: I have a problem. I have a serious problem.
Llama: You are just, terrible today!
CARL: Shhh! D'you hear that? That's the sound of forgiveness.
Llama: That's the sound of people drowning Carl.
CARL: That is what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence.

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13y ago

Paul: Carrrrlll! We're supposed to be on vacation!

Carl: I don't know about you but I am having a wonderful time here..

Paul: You toppled the South American government Carl!

Carl: The people have spoken. Viva Le Resistance!

Paul: You pushed the Resistance leader into a giant fan.

Carl: He was a traitor and a scoundrel.

Paul: He was trying to stop you from pushing other people into a giant fan..

*kick*

Carl: Oh! That was a foot! I appear to have swallowed an entire person!

Paul: That would be the hotel bartender

Carl: Well that explains why my Mojito is taking so long!

Paul: It was horrifying! Your mouth unhinged like a snake!

Carl: Wow that sounds pretty awesome!

Paul: I can't go anywhere with you Carl!

Carl: That hurt my feelings. Now we're both in the wrong.

Paul: I wanna go home. We're leaving..

Carl: In that case I should probably mention that I filled our luggage with orphan meat

Paul: Wha...What?

Carl: Well Im building a meat drag and not just any meat will do.

Paul: You know what? Forget it...Im not even shocked anymore.

Carl: Awww...thats no fun.

Paul: This has become the norm for you Carl!

Carl: I'll have to try harder next time.

Paul: Please don't!

Carl: I feel like I've been issued a challenge

Paul: Carrrrrlllll!

Carl: It's too late now...you...

Paul: You?

Carl: I totally don't remember your name

Paul: We've known each other for three years Carl!

Carl: ...and what an impression you've made...

Paul: My name is Paul.

Carl: What?

Paul: I said my name is Paul.

Carl: Oh....I thought you were a woman...

Paul: Why would you think that?

Carl: Mostly the hat. Are you sure?

Paul: Of course I'm sure.

Carl: Well...if you'll excuse me...I have some pictures to delete from my computer...

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13y ago

Llamas in hats 4!

Paul: Carl you've tracked mud all over the carpet.

Carl: Now that right there is a mess!

Paul: I just had it cleaned yesterday, Carl!

Carl: I'm not responsible for this! I've been jamming on the Saxophone all morning!

Paul: Those are clearly your hoof prints Carl!

Carl: Then there is an impostor on the loose!

Paul: They lead directly to you!

Carl: Clue number one, the impostor is a phantom!

Paul: Carl, stop avoid--

BOOM

CARLL!!

Carl: Happy Birthday!

Paul: It's not...please tell me you had nothing to do with this?!

Carl: Why don't you blow out your candle?

Paul: You've gone to far this time, Carl!

Carl: What's that? It's hard to hear you over the sound of melting city.

Paul: How did you even do this?

Carl: A dollop of fairy dust!

Paul: CARL.

Carl: I ripped a tag off a mattress!

Paul: This isn't funny, Carl!

Carl: Who's laughing? Clearly not all the people who just exploded!

Paul: I'm leaving..I've had enough of this!

Carl: But think of all the perfectly roasted faces we get to munch on now!

Paul: But why!

Carl: Because were friends, and friendship is two pals munching on a well cooked face together.

Paul: That isn't friendship Carl, that's sick!

Carl: Well then your probably not going to like your birthday decoration!

Paul: It's not even my...oh my gosh!

Carl: SURPRISE!

PAul: Ah oh uh no ah uh!

Carl: I'm sorry! I thought you liked faces. Obviously there was a miscommunication.

Paul: This awful Carl!

Carl: You're right. It's not nearly as tasteful as i pictured it in my head.

Paul: I think I'm going to throw...oh god one touched me!

Carl: This was clearly the wrong way to go.

Paul: Ya think, Carl?!

Carl: What can I say? I expected them to be cooked more. Raw face is just gross.

Paul: But that isn't the problem, Carl! Why would you think any of this is a good idea?

Carl: Probably because I'm a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence.

Paul: Oh...

Carl: I don't understand how you keep forgetting that.

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11y ago

Paul: Carrrl! We're supposed to be on vacation!

Carl: I don't know about you, but I am having a wonderful time here.

Paul: You toppled a South American government, Carl!

Carl: The people have spoken, "Viva la resistance!"

Paul: You pushed the resistance leader into a giant fan!

Carl: He was a traiter and a scoundrel.

Paul: He was trying to stop you from pushing other people into a giant fan!

-KICK FROM WITHIN CARL-

Carl: Whoa, that was a foot. I appear to have swallowed an entire person.

Paul: That would be the hotel bartender.

Carl: Well, that explains why my mojito was taking so long.

Paul: It was horrifying! Your mouth unhinged like a snake!

Carl: Wow, that sounds pretty awesome.

Paul: I can't go anywhere with you, Carl.

Carl: That hurt my feelings, now we're both in the wrong.

Paul: I wanna go home! We're leaving.

Carl: In that case, I should probably mention that I filled our luggage with orphan meat.

Paul: Wha...WHAT?

Carl: Well, I'm building a meat dragon, and not just any meat will do.

Paul: You know what? Forget it! I'm not even shocked anymore!

Carl: Aww... That's no fun.

Paul: This has become the norm for you, Carl.

Carl: I'll have to try harder next time.

Paul: Please don't.

Carl: I feel like I've been issued a challenge.

Paul: Carrrl!

Carl: It's too late now, you...

Paul: You?

Carl: I totally don't remember your name.

Paul: We've known each other for three years, Carl!

Carl: And what an impression, you've made.

Paul: My name is Paul.

Carl: What?

Paul: I said my name is Paul.

Carl: Oh... I thought you were a woman.

Paul: Why would you think that?

Carl: Mostly the hat, are you sure?

Paul: Of course I'm sure!

Carl: Well... If you'll excuse me I have some pictures to delete from my computer...

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12y ago

Carl and Paul are their names. Carl is the one who misbehaves.

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13y ago

Llamas with hats didn't release. :(

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13y ago

Ya For sure

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