What is the normal amount of sex if you are a 40-year-old woman married to a 44-year-old male and he only wants sex 2-3 times a month and you would like much more?

Answer 1

Well, I am speaking from the point of view of a 29 year old male ( so not too much younger than your man). I would guess at least 3 times a week at minimum. I personally am usually down for a minimum of 1 a day. But, the situation requires that you consider some things. Guys vary greatly in their motivations towards sex. Some guys see their sexual conquests like a hunter they lose interest when that which was pursued is caught. Think, was he really sexualy and/or romantically aggressive in the beginning and not now? If so you may have to give him space and seem less eager to get laid. Or even have his attention. If you look at your guy and he seems not to be that way, consider novelty. When you have sex do something different. Do you get off loudly or quietly? Do you touch yourself or talk? wait for him to initiate or start it yourself? Whatever you do, try some thing different? It really depends on how your guy is. If he is able to talk with you find out his fantasies. If not tell him about some of yours, and when you have his full attention start touching your own body. Also guys at his age may be under increasing stresses, and may be distracted alot. You may need to get him to lay down and relax, maybe try a massage from you. Perhaps then he will unwind and associate the sex with an enjoyable event instead of work or a task. On that note try you being on top if you have been on the bottom-and go at his pace. He might need to feel that you are concerned about him enjoying the sex. You have to know your guy-and take action based on how he is or at least ask questions here that tell how he is. If this behavior is new you may need to consider the possibility of cheating, I hope not. If you approach a guy correctly it shouldn't be that difficult to get more lovin', but I know a lot of guys can be very difficult. Try saying, again, if he is open to talking, "I am very hot for you and I want to make you feel good every chance we get- what can I do for you to make you feel as good as I do when we are together?" And this is key- do it. No delays or questions-the next time you are together do what he wants. If you care about him and his needs it may become easier for him to focus on yours. Some guys clam up, feel awkward about sex? The more you know about him the better you will be able to figure out what buttons to push. I hope this helps in some way!

Answer 2

There is no normal amount of sex. Some people in their forties love sex and some tend to mellow out. Unfortuanely when people are together for a long time, the sex dwindles because of a number of reasons; a) they are bored with each other b) they are bored with each other, and c) they are bored with each other. In order to spice things up, you need to talk about the fact that you are unfulfilled, try to think of way to change things up, and hopefully reduce the boredom factor. There are plenty of 40 year olds who love sex and have a healthy sex life, but it's work and if he's worth it, and he's willing to care about your needs, it's worth hanging in there.