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The back of the neck is called the 'nape,' but when people refer to "your kitchen" they're actually talking about the small area of hair located on the base of the skull and top of the neck.
The 'kitchen' is the unruly area of hair that normally is removed when getting a haircut.
By the way, this seems to be a more common term in the Black community.
As far as why it's called 'kitchen,' I couldn't find a definitive answer but since that area is an errogenous zone that gets most women "hot" and gets them "cooking..." Hey, it's just a guess!
Kitchen
Middle English kichene, from Old English cycene, probably from Vulgar Latin *cocna, from Late Latin coquna, from feminine of Latin coqunus, of cooking, from coquus, cook, from coquere, to cook.
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