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Why does she need space?

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June 11, 2007 9:34PM

More often than not, that line is a prelude to a break-up. It's a euphemism for "I really don't like spending time with you anymore," or (not quite as harsh) "Perhaps we shouldn't see each other as much as we do," or "I think our relationship has hit a dead end (or a plateau), and I want to see other people." But it's not always that dire. It could very well be that she feels smothered by the relationship, that you require too much of her time, that she hasn't got the free time for herself to do the things that interest her but that don't involve you. The two of you may have fallen into a rut of always seeing each other and not making plans that don't involve the other. Many people who become "a couple" feel the loss of their own individualism, and they resent it. She may be feeling that way. Giving her "space" and allowing her some privacy and independence -- from you -- may be just what your relationship needs. Or not.