"Funeral" Letter of Instructions - Have it Your Way?

Answer 1

You've had that somewhat awkward talk with your spouse, about having Ellis Funeral Home handle your burial, you may even have told your spouse the color casket you'd prefer. Which is all great and dandy, but alas, you also mention to one of your siblings that you were considering cremation. This is how conflict and confusion can begin. However, by preparing a letter of instructions your final wishes can be carried out and misunderstandings can be avoided.

One of the most suitable methods for individuals to include their funeral/burial plans, is in a letter of instructions, not in a will (which is normally not readily accessible).

A letter of instructions (final wishes or last rights)is just that, a document that specifies the testator's (maker of will) desires regarding organ donation, funeral and burial plans. It can also be used as an all-inclusive checklist containing informative information to assist the family and/or representative in locating and identifying property, insurance policies, and various documents needed to manage the decedent's desires and estate.

All too frequently, serious disagreements arise over such questions as whether there should be a burial or cremation, which funeral home to use, who will be the pall bearers, the order of service, and even the music selections. Sometimes the family disregards the funeral plans outlined in the will because the will isn't located until after death or the arrangements are too elaborate or too expensive. For example: Alice wants to be cremated and have her ashes flown to Marshall Island ( located in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, just N. of the Equator) one of the most expensive places to fly and spread over one of the exclusive coral islands.

By preplanning, prepaying (if possible), and drafting a letter of instructions (to ensure testator's wishes will be followed without revealing the contents of their will) it can remove a heavy burden off a grieving family, both emotionally and economically. A person can include their plans into the letter of instructions and review their desired plans with his/her family, clergy, and personal representative; then if there are any concerns or objections, they can be resolved prior to a loved one's death.

Additionally, if an individual intends to donate organs, a donation instruction must be included in the letter of instructions instead of the will which may not be discovered in time to make a "useful" organ donation.

Lastly, although the letter of instructions is an important tool to have on hand, it is essentially a multipurpose document, but it is not legally enforceable. It is, therefore, not a substitute for a will.

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