That males and females require different training in preparation for parenthood?

Answer 1

You could take one of 3 or 4 positions in the argument about whether mothers or fathers need different training, and you'd likely be wrong. I'll give you two.

The Hormone Argument

The most scientifically-sounding argument sides with mothers, who experience the effects of pregnancy hormones. This argument cites phenomena like "nesting" as support. Nesting begins in the 3rd trimester, when pregnant women begin to 'make a nest' for the baby. This includes activities like having a baby shower, collecting clothing and baby 'stuff', getting baby equipment (bassinet, crib, changing table, car seat, playpen, highchair, etc.) and choosing a "place for baby" within the home. The argument goes on to say that since men don't experience pregnancy hormones, and do not do "nesting", that they miss a critical step of "imagined" bonding with an unborn child. This argument would contend that men simply don't understand, don't connect, or... don't care about their child, and so, men would need "trained" to know what moms already experience internally because of hormones.

However, what then explains mothers who do not nest and do not nurture? Some women even kill their babies. Some people argue these moms must have lower hormones. There are no studies to back this up, but (they say) "certainly this must be true, since women are nurturers!" But is that true? Some women say they aren't and don't want to be thought of as that, or only that. The arguments become circular, and no one has one definitive answer.

The Don't Count Me Out!! Argument

By the end of the 1970s, while women were fighting for "Women's Rights", a sub-set of men began arguing that MEN could be equally excellent fathers versus mothers. Men began petitioning courts for shared or sole custody in divorces, and men argued that non-custodial moms should pay child support -- just like men were made to do! (This could be called the Men's Angry Argument.) But father-custody at that time was not so much about NEWBORNS / BABIES, but older children over 4 to 5 years old. Women argued that kids biologically NEED the mother, since we're the ones who breastfeed. Yet, bottle-fed babies were on the rise, as more women entered the work force and men could easily make up a bottle! But still, did dads experience this paternal instinct ONLY aftersome time of watching the MOTHER caring for her infant? Was a late paternal instinct equal to the early, strong hormonally driven maternal instinct? Instinctively, women resented this male argument-- after all, WE gave birth! Men never felt what Women felt, and suffered. And many men seemed .... inept at parenting even if they wanted custody. Men argued this ineptness was possibly just differences in parenting styles of men! And if that did not explain it, women had kept men from the fathering nurturing role, so what else could they possibly be besides inept at first? (And men reading this will argue---but it rightly depicts events of the late 1970s to early 1980s.)

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Answer 2

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