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This is a very broad topic and difficult to answer without knowing the detailed circumstances. There are many different techniques and tone of voice, tone of language are both important. A good book to read on this is 'Getting To Yes' by Roger Fisher and William Ury (with Bruce Patton for the 2nd Edition). If someone is being stubborn about not communicating to you on the substance of what you are talking about, some brief points to try include: * Telling them what it is that you want and asking for their thoughts on it. * Asking gently what is stopping them from communicating with you and patiently waiting for a response. You can re-phrase this question after waiting a little while for a relevant response and then return to remaining patient. Remember, the people who are hardest to love are the ones who need it the most. * Try to think back to recent events to figure out how they might be feeling about the subject you want to talk about. Suggest in a light way that they might be feeling like this and see how they respond. Depending on the situation, the process may well be a long one. The above points are very brief. Taking the advice in the book I mention is a much richer and much deeper start. You also have to be very clear on what you want. Give yourself time, take a few deep breaths each day or every couple of days and with time, your ability to engage people from all sorts of backgrounds will improve. My kudos goes to you for being brave enough to ask the question. All the best.

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16y ago

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