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Good question. I wish I had a guarenteed solution, but I don't. Every person and every relationship is different. The worst thing you can do is guilt the other person into staying with you. That won't last long and no one will be happy. My boyfriend of 3.5 years broke up with me. The best advice I can give is this. Wait and be there. Be his friend, be available, but keep living your own life. I wrote my boyfriend a long letter detailing the things that I loved about him and why; also memories of how I felt about him when we were blissfully in love. I just asked him to remember how he felt about me and see if he could rekindle those feelings. Don't avoid him, be friends, but don't follow him around and continuously tell him how much you love him. When my boyfriend broke up with me, I was heart-broken. I tried for a week to win him back. After the letter, I felt better. I started to think about things I could do now that he never liked to do. I didn't quit loving him, but I quit 'bothering' him. After one day of me not calling him he called me. He calls me at least once a day to see how I am. We're not back together, but he's not dating anyone else. I can see he still cares about me. If he comes around and I'm available, great. If not, I'm determined to be happy. The best revenge is living well and loving yourself enough to go on without him might make him question his decision. But it might not, so be happy with someone else or on your own while you wait. Stay friends and be patient. There is no real answer to this question. Sorry. Drop him like a rock and move on with life. I think your better off starting in a new relationship that will not have the scars of a break-up in it. Keeping a relationship that is as free of serious scars is important if you want a long-term one.

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20y ago

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