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This is perhaps the hardest thing you will ever do. Hate is a strong emotion, and it is fueled by anger. The only other emotion that may even compare is love, and some people say the two are opposite sides of the same coin. Not true, by the way, the opposite of love is apathy. In this lies the secret of how to stop hating.

You have to divorce yourself of all feeling toward that person. You have to not care, not be interested, not be concerned. Hate and love are intertwined, but they are not opposites. Often, hate is left when love dies. To have so much emotion, such great feeling for someone, typically results from the end of an equally strong feeling.

Begin asking yourself:

What does this person do for me?

Does he pay my rent/mortgage?

Does he feed me?

Clothe me?

Take me from place to place as I need?

If the answer is "no" to these questions, then you are on your way to divorcing yourself of the feeling for this person. Think about it, if the person has no affect on your life, beyond what you feel, then that person is not important enough to hate, and you can begin exchanging your hate for apathy.

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15y ago

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