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He does not understand love to begin with. By cheating on his wife and having an affair, he is simply showing that he loves himself more than he loves other. He is chasing the dream of self fulfillment and the "New Age" religious thought process of making ourselves happy and putting ourselves first and foremost! Love is not self-serving and all affairs are self-serving! Most people are misinterpreting the definition of love, they want to be glorified and not loved.

AnswerHe may love them both, but the important question may be more like which one is he being honest with? Cheating is an issue of loss of trust. If he still loves you and the two of you can work it out, then maybe you can forgive him. You really need to talk to him to find out. A word of caution, if he is abusive, it may be very dangerous for you to confront him about his cheating. Ask him how he really feels and ask him if he still loves you. How that conversation plays out will be a big part of this. It also depends if the affair was with only one woman for a very long time or just once, or a few weeks. Was it a serious relationship? You should never let a relationship get stale. Although if he says he's in love with the other woman you might have to really talk that out with him. ANSWERA married man that has an affair is usually doing so out of his own selfishness and personal needs. He will tell you anything you want hear to keep you interested and will string you along until he is done with you or there is an option of being caught. In most cases he has no intentions of leaving his wife for you although he may develop some feelings for you he will not choose you over his wife/family in the end. An affair never ends on a good note - it is best to end one as soon as possible and move on. AnswerI agree with the above poster (but this goes for women that cheat on their husbands as well.)

Some men can't just have one woman in their life so they cheat. Some men may well love their wife, but, instead of communication to her if he's unhappy he may have an affair (it isn't always love) with another woman but to fill his (mainly) sexual needs.

Some men in the 40 year old bracket can have what they call 'Andropause' (similar to women's menopause) and feel they have a need to prove they are attractive to the opposite sex and also to do some of the things they missed out on in life. Although this is still not an excuse for cheating this is a dangerous time in some men's lives.

It is true that the statistics prove that if a man should cheat, get caught or leave the relationship doesn't mean he'll run to his mistress and you can bet he will probably not marry her. He has found his freedom to do as he wishes, while other men that leave their wives soon regret it. Just read some of the posts under 'Relationships ... cheating' where both men and women have cheated and lost something very precious .... the respect and trust of their mate!

Most people feel if someone cheats once they will do it again and there is a ring of truth to that.

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