Is it common for abusive ex-boyfriends to show up a lot out of the blue when you're out and ignore you?

Answer 1

Yes it is because they are an abusive nature. They treated you like garbage, yet in their own twisted way they did care about you. Abusers are about control and even though he may be running all over town he doesn't like the idea of another guy having you and sure hates the thought you may have become independent and found someone you actually love. He's keeping an eye on you! If this abusive ex keeps turning up in too many places and bothers you in anyway it's called "harrassment or stalking" and you can never be too careful. There isn't much you can do if he turns up at a public place, but if he phones you, turns up where you live or bothers any of your friends you can nail his butt! Be careful! NEVER underestimate an abuser or a person of a quiet nature. They may fade off into the sunset and leave you alone, but many can come back and harm you and some, will even become so enraged they can attack and kill. Still waters run deep! I suggest you change where you hang out if they are place you both use to frequent. Good luck Marcy

Answer 2

In around about way he is stalking you. Abusers OWN THINGS (including you) and he doesn't like to lose. He wants to catch you in the act and find out who you are going out with. It's up for grabs (depends on the abuser's personality) if he'll take his anger out on the guy you are dating at the time. He doesn't phone you because that's not his style, but it looks like he still has control of you. Watch out! There are good programs at "Abused Women's Centers" and they can help you find a solution to your problem. Unfortunately, the police will only tell you that there is no harm if he is lurking around where you live (as long as he's not on your property) and so you can't lay charges. The abuser has to do something to the victim before police can take action. Good luck & watch out! Marcy I think it is very common, it has been in my case. He does not call because he is stalking. My phone was tapped, he would break into my house when I was gone and search everything and he would come into the back yard and watch me through my window. Mine knew exactly where I was and what I was doing and today, after three years, I still can not go out in my hometown. I have become a recluse. If you can get out of town do it. Restraining orders do not work very well if he is sneaky.

Answer 3

he is trying to intimidate you