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In order to stimulate emotional development in a child we would most likely need to know what causes this lack of development. The emotional part of the brain does not evolve or develop the same way in all children. Not even under similar and possibly ideal conditions.

Some children just does not grasp "emotions" at all, often due to certain conditions like "Asperger syndrome".

Some of these children can learn how to behave but are still unable to use their "feelings" in order to do this.

Often they do not understand why other people experience pain or discomfort, this be psychological or physical. They might not even understand the concept of death and may believe that dead people or pets can be repaired just about the same way as a car or bike or any other toy can be.

We can stimulate emotional development but we need to know what particular problems to address in order for this to be very effective, and even then the outcome is not always certain.

A common problem with a few children is that they bite. It can be a battle to turn the child away from biting, especially if he/she think the result from it is somewhat hilarious. The child may think it is fun to have the screaming reaction of a brother or sister and does not really understand that the action actually involve pain.

Some children does not understand why they should not do this because when they are told off, that is often only with words that mean little to the child. The law at the same time protect children and we are not allowed to hurt them and hence, we are forced by the law to use other non violent solutions.

Parents can be torn apart by this problem and feel that they should do something to protect (often the younger family member) but can not teach the child by actually doing to the child what the child does to others.

It is important to make the child think about what he/she has done. It is important to relate the thoughts towards the child itself. This way the child will understand.

By "biting" the child back and then ask if he/she thought it was pleasant, this will make the child think about the problem. If the child answers "Yes", then you did not bite hard enough. If the child answers "No", then you can explain that his/her victim too feels the same way. Ask the child if he/she think it is a good thing to bite people. If the child says "Yes", then bite the child again. This somewhat "brutal method" is however against the law in some countries but at the same time quite effective.

Try to make an effort to teach your children that what they do not enjoy being done to them selves, they should not do to others. Sit down with them. Read aloud certain books or watch certain films together. Pay attention to the child's reactions and try to ask him/her what he/she think is right or wrong.

Be choosy of books you read. Find books and films that address emotional situations. A library has got a fair few of these. Make sure you choose books and films that are for the age group of your child. Further more, read and watch the books/films before showing them to the child. If you think that they are not good, then find some other.

It will be easier to use words and explain issues as the child grows older and understand more. Always explain issues by putting your child in center. This strongly stimulates understanding and emotional development.

Remember that emotional development is not a wonder done overnight. It takes time and constant work but it does pay off in absolutely most cases.

There are many books on the subject and I would recommend you to borrow a few at a library. A librarian would be able to advice you further.

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15y ago

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