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What should you do if your son is 6 years old and his birth father who has known about him all his life but never seen him now wants to be involved in his life?
My son, who is 24 years old now had never met his biological father until he was 15 years old. His father contacted me after years of not even knowing where he lived and asked permission to meet him. My response was that I hoped that it would be a good thing, but that he was old enough then that it was not my decision, but his. Ultimately, he and my son started having lunch together occasionally, etc. and developed a mutual understanding of an unusual relationship of father/son. He even moved in with him and his step-mom for a few months after high school to be closer to a place of employment. That eventually became strained, but mainly because of marital problems in the home, and my son was not used to discord on the homefront, so he only stayed there a few months and moved back home. My son lives in Southern Florida now and his father and I both are located in the Midwest. He also became acquainted with his other grandparents who love him and always invite him to be with them on holidays, etc. The two of them still talk occasionally, and I have NEVER regretted their meeting. He is half his father, regardless of what occured or did not occur between his father and I. I don't believe in burning bridges because all things change...nothing stays the same.Hope this helps someone else.
AnswerIt depends on the character of the father. If you are settled with someone else and your son is happy the way he is, then it's best not to open this can of worms. However, people make mistakes. If the birth father has matured, is a nice guy, then I would gradually introduce your son back into his life as your son is going to find out sooner or later. If his birth father is not a nice guy, then get legal council and be sure he is out of your life until your son is of age to make up his own mind as to whether he wants to meet his birth father.Good luckMarcy
AnswerI would be happy that the father is taking an interest in the child's life before it's to late the child needs to know who his father is anyway, I'm looking at the future when I make this comment, Unforseen occurences happen to everyone, and what if something tramatic happens and you need his father support, or let's say if the father has other kids,as the old saying goes "what a small world" don't want your child to be dating sister or cousin because you decided not give the father a chance it could happen seriously give him a chance to make amend with his child, I know my spouse is going through the same thing now, but the only difference is my spouse was in his daughter life for almost the first year of his daughter life and after we married the mother took his daughter away from him until last year (9) when she decided to get child support and now my spouse wants to see his daughter to let her know that he cares and he love her and do want to be apart of her life and he has always wanted to be apart of her life, but it was out of her hand he pays childsupport and that's not even the problem, the mother doesn't want him to see his daughter, because she feels his daughter will love him more than she do her, she gave up a good thing and I think she knows that, and my two sons would love to meet there sister and so that you may know I'm all for it, you would think it would be me telling my spouse not to pursue it but it's not, that's why I continue to say it's a small world, I hope this will help you in making your decision my spouse example. I know both situations and I'm not being bias I believe in what's best for the kids you can let them meet in the park while you observe how they interact with each other it's a good thing. You know your own situation so go from there, I just told you my spouse. Something to think about.
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