You resent your husband.How do you let that go?

Answer 1

Choose to let it go. Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. When you forgive, you set yourself free. The key thing about grudges and resentment is that it stays within you, not him. You make resent him but that resentment is not welled up in his body giving him colds, cancer, and other diseases; it's doing that inside of you. The negative emotions, feelings and thoughts you keep in your body are bound to manifest in the form of disease. Do you really want that? Do you need that? Of course you don't. Forgive him; make a choice not to resent him. Why? Because we are all human beings who are not perfect; we make mistakes and you cannot hold someone to a mistake he made because he is not the same person now that he was 5 minutes ago let alone 5 years ago and if you're holding onto something from the past, you aren't giving him the room to be more of who he is now and that's a prison; you've become his jailer and no one will stay with his jailer for very long. No matter what he did, you have to let it go and choose to forgive. I didn't say you have to stay married to him. I didn't say you have to continue to let him treat you less than you deserve. We teach people how to treat us. If you don't like the way he treats you, teach him how to treat you differently. I also didn't say forgive and forget. Forgiveness does not equate to being stupid. You can forgive someone and release them from the shame, blame and guilt of what they did without going to a place where you say, "Oh, I'll act like this never happened." Of course you need to be mindful of what happened. As Maya Angelou says, "When someone shows you who they are, BELIEVE THEM!" But you can let it go, forgive him, and allow him the room to be his best self while still making the choices for you that allow you to be your best self. Bottom line, forgive him and let the resentment go, not for him but for you.