What is the translation for the Gnommish in Artemis Fowl book 2?

Answer 1

The translation is:

The demon scrolls tell of a warlock that will come to save our people but I wouldn't rely too much on the scrolls. They also say that rabbits are the supreme beings and that the best cure for a sore throat is a poultice of dung and old socks. Hence trust the scrolls at your peril. There are, however, a few basic tips for survival in a demon tribe that might be helpful if you were a human, say, and had never actually met a demon before. Which is unlikely, to say the least. If you were human, you wouldn't be able to read, in the first place. So. Demon survival tips. First, never stab a demon with his own sword. This is the ultimate insult and will result in a vendetta that could go on for generations. It is fine to stab a demon with your sword; he will congratulate you for managing that, but only poor warriors lose their swords and then get stabbed with them. If the opportunity arises, give it a miss. Second. Demons have a pretty comprehensive system of sign language in which buttock slapping features heavily. It is very important not to slap the wrong buttock. Never slap someone else's buttock unless they stab you with your own sword; that is considered very bad manners. And learn the difference between the left buttock slap and a right buttock slap. If a passerby aims his buttocks at you and slaps the left one it means that there is a full moon due that evening and he hopes you will join him for the traditional hunt. If he slaps the right buttock it simply means that you remind him of his right buttock. You can see where problems could arise. Finally, never sneeze into your fist. Always allow the sneeze to run free into the air. Medical demons assure us that the sneeze comprises millions of tiny flying demons that zoom around the earth until they can find a human to land on. When they alight on their host, humans, they hack into their scalps with tiny axes causing terrible headaches which make the humans easy to defeat in battle. Therefore when a demon sneezes, immediately slap your right buttock in the direction of the sneeze so that the tiny demons can pass on the message to the human they land on.

This repeats 4 times.

Answer 2

The Prophecies of Ohm, phlegm pot cleaner to Frond, elven king. I am Ohm, phlegm pot cleaner to the king. But I am much more than that, for I see the future written in the phlegm. For centuries we pixies have read the phlegm, but I am the best there has ever been. My visions are generally of little importance.I foretell outbreaks of troll pox or gas spasms among elderly dwarves. But sometimes even a poor pot cleaner can see wondrous things. A vision came to me two moons ago when I was gazing deep into His Majesty's own phlegm pot. I was heating the pot over a flame when the sign appeared. This vision was more vivid and detailed than any I had previously seen. Because of its importance I decided to write it down for posterity. And so I can say I told you so. I saw an age when the People have been driven underground by the Mud Men. This is what the phlegm told me. In this time one shall come among us. Fowl by name and foul by nature. A Mud Man unlike any other. He shall learn our secrets and use them against us. I see him now as plain as day. His face is pale and he has dark eyes and raven hair. Yet it must be a mistake, for he seems a mere youth. Surely no Mud Boy could outwit the People. But now I see that the boy is not alone. He is aided by a formidable warrior scarred from a thousand battles. This Fowl shall hold the People to ransom for their most precious possession-gold. And in spite of all our magic there is a chance that he will prevail. For he has discovered how to escape the time field. Unfortunately, how the story ends I cannot say. But there was more to see. There is another story to come. Someone will bring the people and Mud Men together. The worst of both races. This fairy's goal is to grind all the creatures of the earth beneath his boot. And who is this traitor it is not clear. But he shall start a war unlike anything the People have ever seen. Those who were enemies shall be united against him. And for the first time there will be Mud Men below ground. I have one clue to his identity: a riddle.Goblins shall rise and Haven shall fall.A villainous elf[1] is behind it all.To find the one who so disappoints,Look ye to where the finger points.Instead of one face, this elf has two.Both speak false and none speak true.While publicly he lends a helping hand,His true aim is to seize command.

I know, it's not very plain, is it? I don't understand either. But perhaps in the future all will become clear. Look for a power-hungry elf who has a finger pointed at him during our tale. And so this is Ohm's legacy. A warning that may save the world from total destruction. There's not much to work with, I know. The details are a bit sketchy. My advice to you is to consult the phlegm. It may be that you are sensitive. I have buried this prophecy with my phlegm pot. If you are not fortunate enough to work as a pot cleaner then there is usually a supply of phlegm every time you have a cold. Here endeth the first prophecies of Ohm. But because of the importance of my visions I shall repeat the prophecies once more. If you have just begun to understand the text, then read on. If you have worked out the entire message then congratulations. Now go and save the world.

Answer 3

If you mean the symbols at the bottom of the pages of 'The Arctic Incident', they say: Congratulations human. If you have cracked this code then you are more intelligent than most of your species. This is a message from the fairy people. We are seeking out our allies among the mud men. Though most humans are dullwitted creatures there are exception's. You for example...

The 'fairies then say that you are clever because you're part fairy, and give you a mission to save the Earth by 'using only what you kneed, and using it well'.

It's not a difficult code, most of the symbols are just sort of square versions of English letters, so if you want to know the specifics it won't take long.

Answer 4

look up two way gnommish translator on a search engine (preferably bing.com) and click on it.