How do you recognize narcissism?

Answer 1

When I met my NPD ex, he was persuing me very hard. In fact so hard that it was uncomfortable, but I was very young and didn't know to trust my judgment. Sometimes we would be at a restaurant and he would grab my hand and just stare at me. Which by itself is not a problem, I think lots of people do this when they are infatuated. But what was weird is his stare, there was no real feeling behind it. It felt like he read to do this somewhere (dating manual) that this is what you supposed to do to bring women to their knees. The stare was empty, snake like, somewhat socio-pathic. I dismissed my own alarm about it. Now thinking back, that should of been a warning. I have had other relationships since then. I have had people stare at me since then, but at least their stare contained, love, desire or something...

This was the final piece of evidence I needed. I was totally under his control when he would do his stare. He would angle his face to one side and slightly raise his chin and stare into me. And I mean really into me - like he was reading what I was thinking and almost controlling my thoughts. The stare would be held and would be utterly seductive and totally compelling. Reptilian is the PERFECT description. I would feel like a rabbit caught in the headlight. Completly under his control. Every time I would try to break up with him or get away I would get this stare. I have never met anybody else who would do it - or be able to. I would say to him stop looking at me like that and he would say I was the one who was staring. It would render me totally his. Three of my friends al pointed a different stare out to me - one of evil jealousy. In that he would glare at friends of mine who I was talking to. He would also NEVER take his eyes off me if we were out in company. Would be scanning my every move. The final look in his eyes was one of nothing. I I was tentitively trying to talk about us - he would not be able to make eye contact and would look down and shake his head. I could almost see his brain working behind his eyes in order to come up with another lie. ALso when we did make love his eyes would almost be half closed and glazed over. Like he was mastrabating rather than connecting. When we would get together hew would hold my head and TELL me to look into his eyes. TELL me to tell him I loved him. I could not. I know that something was very wrong, however I had after 3.5 years of it come to believe that I was a cold worthless robot with no emotion at all. I finally ended it by ignoring him - it was the only way - I cut his supply. WIthin 2 weeks he was in love with another and getting married.... I occassionally bump into him and get the stare - the reptilian one - it makes me want to be physically sick.

2 -

Now that you mention it... YES. The eyes are interesting to look at. Lacking on warmth, humanity, cold and calculating. It didnt dawn on me at first but in recollection, i DID notice it and dismissed it. There are somethings a habitual liar or imposter just cant control all the time.

Eyes are the windows to human being's mind. it's very reflexible just as our complicated mind. The cold eyes without warmth was not normal. I can imagine that kind of stare like some full actors', or in your words, reptilian eyes. I'm sure that some part of his brain function was impaired. The eyes just perform the brain function impairment out.

Answer 2

I believe that I have a neighbour who suffers from this problem. He will take it upon himself to tell others that they should do this or that, because that is the way he likes it done, or he will do things to other peoples property in their absence and then send them the bill because he believes totally that he has a right to do so. He talks about himself in grandiose terms as if he is a CEO of some massive multinational company when in fact he dabbles at a bit of small jobbing building (not very efficiently) and is otherwise mostly at home. He loves to interfere in other peoples lives by doing pointless things to annoy , and appears to find it impossible to just live quietly and keep himself to himself within a small village community (definitely a small fish in a small pond) although when questioned about this he will assure you that he has totally altruistic reasons for doing so - even if he has stolen from you! He seems totally without conscience - but I believe he actually cannot see any opinion but his own, nor recognise that anything anyone else says has merit. He will even argue that (for instance) a piece of land is "his" and he "bought" it - whilst you are showing him the deeds that clearly state it is not his or the person he claims "sold" it to him is stating that they did not. He can waffle on for hours (seriously) about how well loved and respected he is in the community and what he has done for us all - when in fact we all dread him coming into sight (and indeed most of us will hide, or pretend not to hear the door or will grab car keys so that we may rush past him on an "urgent mission" to escape the hours of listening to him pat himself on the back). He is actually detested and considered a con man and a crook by most of us - to the extent that when something is felt to be totally wierd irritating and awkward we refer to it as being "totally JSB" (his initials). When foiled he becomes petulant and childish and has little written tantrums that are rather amusing for all they are gradually very wearing. In all megalomanic narcissist of the year.

Answer 3

Easy! It's always all about them. Your converstions with, time spent them, and then your entire life will be all about THEM. After they draw you in and gain your trust, that's when they have you. You will become a prisoner of their Narcissistic desires. The best way to deal with Narcissists is to get away from them. Fast!

Answer 4

Narcissist are great at tricking people into believing they are something different than what they actually are. While they might at times have arrogant facial expressions or seem to show no emotion towards you at all, expect them appear confident. The last thing a narcissist wants is for you to discredit him by calling him a narcissist, so it is probably safe to assume that they are trying to avoid arrogant facial expressions.