What do you do if you are afraid you are a pedo and you are 14 years old?

Answer 1

That's a hard challenge to face. I think that the most important thing to remember is that you don't have to be anything you don't want to be. You get to choose, even your emotions and desires. We can all overcome urges that are sending us in the wrong direction, or down paths that lead to places we don't want to go or into becoming people we don't want to be.

We can't always do it alone, though. Usually we need some help to overcome the darkest parts of ourselves. I would encourage you to talk to an adult you trust, and ask for help. It could be your parents, or a counselor at school, or perhaps a pastor or priest at your church. Finding a way to get help from a trained psychologist or counselor will help, as will prayer and trusting in a "higher power" (which is what they call God in the overcoming addiction groups).

Do your best. Stay away from things that make you feel like you are turning into someone you don't want to be. Avoid people who encourage you to do bad things. As long as you are doing your best, God will help you. And find someone to talk to about it if you possibly can. A counselor can help a lot, because he or she can help you learn why you feel the way you do, and work on changing it.

Answer 2

I hate to see kids label themselves. We all get labeled so much in our lifetimes---and most often, the labels never fit in the first place.

What I hear you saying in your description of your concern is that you feel confused about feelings of attraction-- or put another way, of "liking". In particular, one example, a girl from Dance Moms, makes you feel especially confused. Further, because the girl is younger than you are now, feelings of liking makes you wonder if the label "Pedo" applies to you. Yet, you strongly state you would never hurt a child. So, what's all this about?

Is "liking" different people at different times in our lives normal? Yes. Does it mean we qualify for a label? Not necessarily. How do you know the difference? When "liking" makes you afraid you would do something wrong, then, you need to pay attention and make sure you don't do anything that is wrong.

The good thing about "liking" as a teenager is that most teens (girls and guys) like someone in the public, usually from television. They are people who a teen would never meet in real life. The TV persons can be younger or older, same race or a different race, someone your family would also like or strongly not like. This is a normal part of young teenage years. However, teens don't act on these "likes". There is a big difference between having thoughts and acting on thoughts. If you ever get confused about that, talk to an adult such as your school counselor. But-- avoid labeling yourself, lest someone starts to label you, too, when the label could be a mistake.