Why are narcissist cowards?

Answer 1

I am blown away as I read about narcissists. For months my ex boyfriend had me convinced that our relationship ended 5 months ago because I couldn't just trust him and be happy. I was filled with self doubt because this man who was amazing to me in the beginning, treating me like a queen, professing his love, promising a future of marriage and kids, and telling me that he was more than willing to wait until marriage to have sex with me completely changed overnight to a man who could not care less. As I read these articles on narcissists my feelings of self doubt come to a complete understanding of this very sick man. He was everything he thought I wanted in the beginning. Its scary to realise that he was so in tune in what I actually wanted. When I started to uncover some lies such as the fact that he did not have his own house but lived with his parents at 32. People started telling me that he was a well known drug addict. And the business that he supposidly was just selling had fallen apart and left him in 100 thosand dollars in debt that he could not even begin to pay back. I quickly realised that everything he told me was simply a facaud. As soon as these lies were uncovered he left me for another girl that he began making the same meaningless promises to. He disappeared for like 4 days before he even called me back and would not talk to me face to face saying I don't deserve someone who runs from his problems. Unfortunately for me though, 5 months later, I just was informed by the other girl who he left me for that there ever was another girl. In the past 5 months he kept calling me still saying he missed me and promising that when his problems were sorted out we could be together again because I was just that special. Throughout that time he took me out and after a couple of drinks one night we even slept together. It hurt me because I wanted to wait and it seemed that he could not care less what he took from me. I am a pretty girl and I have been asked out by many sucessful and wonderful men who I never gave a chance to because all this time I blamed myself for not being more trusting. N's are very persuasive and when you become involved you doubt yourself for losing their love. Now that it is clear I feel so much better to know that I never really had this man's love in the first place and I feel the warning signs will be easier to detect in the future.

Answer 2

It's possible that Narcissism is (at least in part) a defense mechanism against getting emotionally hurt. After all, the narcissist has no fear of rejection from his biggest fan: himself.

However, calling a narcissist a coward may be stretching the point a bit too thin. Unless the self-love extends to the point where the person in question refuses to engage in social activities (for fear of damaging their looks, or their reputation, for example) chances are it's just a social quirk -- though to be fair, one of the more annoying ones for friends and family to have to deal with.