Spiders have eight legs, and then there are two more, shorter, appendages right up next to the chelicerae and the fangs. Those two appendages function rather like our arms. However, for the male spider they are also part of the reproductive system. They function like syringes. The male spider fills them with semen, inserts them one at a time into the body of the female spider (assuming she will welcome him to do it), and then deposits the two syringe-fulls of semen into the female.
So, the extra limbs, called "pedipalps," look rather like arms with heavy boxing gloves on them. They are not slim like the pedipalps of the female.
With tarantulas it is harder to tell, and you really need a tarantula book with pictures and everything to understand how to examine the rest of the reproductive system of that kind of spider.
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i have a girl smokey ghost millipede. So grap His Her head and he tail so you can see its legs .from head down count 6 segments if there is a tiny gapp its a boy no gap [all legs pushed together] is a girl!
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this is the creator we have a dead freaky looking spider we want to know if it has laid eggs