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I described in "The Guilt of the Abused - Pathologizing the Victim" how the system is biased and titled against the victim.
Regrettably, mental health professionals and practitioners - marital and couple therapists, counselors - are conditioned, by years of indoctrinating and dogmatic education, to respond favorably to specific verbal cues.
The paradigm is that abuse is rarely one sided - in other words, that it is invariably "triggered" either by the victim or by the mental health problems of the abuser. Another common lie is that all mental health problems can be successfully treated one way (talk therapy) or another (medication).
This shifts the responsibility from the offender to his prey. The abused must have done something to bring about their own maltreatment - or simply were emotionally "unavailable" to help the abuser with his problems. Healing is guaranteed if only the victim were willing to participate in a treatment plan and communicate with the abuser. So goes the orthodoxy.
Refusal to do so - in other words, refusal to risk further abuse - is harshly judged by the therapist. The victim is labeled uncooperative, resistant, or even abusive!
The key is, therefore, feigned acquiescence and collaboration with the therapist's scheme, acceptance of his/her interpretation of the events, and the use of key phrases such as: "I wish to communicate/work with (the abuser)", "trauma", "relationship", "healing process", "inner child", "the good of the children", "the importance of fathering", "significant other" and other psycho-babble. Learn the jargon, use it intelligently and you are bound to win the therapist's sympathy.
Above all - do not be assertive, or aggressive and do not overtly criticize the therapist or disagree with him/her.
I make the therapist sound like yet another potential abuser - because in many cases, he/she becomes one as they inadvertently collude with the abuser, invalidate the abuse experiences, and pathologize the victim.
Be sure to maintain as much contact with your abuser as the courts, counsellors, mediators, guardians, or law enforcement officials mandate.
Do NOT contravene the decisions of the system. Work from the inside to change judgments, evaluations, or rulings - but NEVER rebel against them or ignore them. You will only turn the system against you and your interests.
But with the exception of the minimum mandated by the courts - decline any and all gratuitous contact with the narcissist. A lot more here: My book: "Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited" (c) 2003 Lidija Rangelovska Narcissus Publications
What else can I help you with?
What isProtective Custody of child vs full custody of child?
It regards the issue of getting an emergency custody order for a child in need of care.
What is domiciliary custody?
Domiciliary custody refers to the parent who has physical custody. It's the parent with whom the child lives.Domiciliary custody refers to the parent who has physical custody. It's the parent with whom the child lives.Domiciliary custody refers to the parent who has physical custody. It's the parent with whom the child lives.Domiciliary custody refers to the parent who has physical custody. It's the parent with whom the child lives.
Does full custody including food money?
Custody is a separate issue from money. Child support payments are about money. Custody is about who raises a child, who is in charge of that child and with whom does that child live.
Can a malignant narcissist love his child?
A malignant narcissist cannot magically shed his damaging patterns of behavior to bestow unconditional love upon his child. A good parent is one who places his child's needs above his own. A narcissist always places their needs first.
How do you get you child out of dys custody in Missouri What degree do the workers at dys have?
Why is the child in state custody?
Would I have to see a child custody lawyer rather than my regular lawyer concerning child custody issues?
"While a lawyer specializing in child custody would be great, most lawyers are qualified to handle child custody cases."
Do I lose custody of my child if I remarry my child's mother after having sole custody?
When married you have equal rights to the child.
Is it illegal to continue to collect support for a child you no longer have custody of?
Yes. If you don't have legal custody then you are not entitled to accept child support.Yes. If you don't have legal custody then you are not entitled to accept child support.Yes. If you don't have legal custody then you are not entitled to accept child support.Yes. If you don't have legal custody then you are not entitled to accept child support.
What are the key provisions of the Pennsylvania child custody statutes?
The key provisions of the Pennsylvania child custody statutes include determining the best interests of the child, factors considered in custody decisions, types of custody arrangements (such as physical and legal custody), and procedures for modifying custody orders.
Can a father file for joint custody of his child?
Yes, a father can file for joint custody of his child, which allows both parents to share legal and physical custody of the child.
Who has child custody in divorce when their is no custody set?
The parents have assumed joint custody.
Sims 2 how do you get custody of a child?
In fact you can, if the sim you want to gain custody is related to the person who has lost the child they may gain custody of the child and will move in with them. I'm not sure if it automatic or if it is ocassional but you can definetly get custody.
