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One needs to keep good stationery for all those Thank You notes. One must know when to offer to shake hands and when not to. One must know which fork or spoon or knife to use, when.One must konw to whom one must curtesy. One must know a headwaiter from a waiter; one must fidget in one's seat waiting for a gentleman to open a car door, which actually does not happen all that often anymore. One must own at least 10 "Miss Manners" books; one must keep one's skirts at the knee, if one is a lady. If one is a lady, one must prepare NOT to laugh at off color jokes, even if they are really funny; gentlemen must know when to send flowers and when not to; gentlemen must know when to rise at a dinner table, and when not to; one must memorize the manners used in the movie "Titanic" one must practice good penmanship; one must learn when to pay, when to offer to pay, but not really pay--one must know when to pay under the table, so the gentleman does not play "grab the check";if one is a lady, one must keep a restaurant staff on quiet retainer, so that the lady does NOT have to practice "grab the check". One must remember when one is being her maiden name and when she is using the name of her husband; one must not sneer at poor people; one must not wear too much make-up. One must NEVER be fashionable. One (the lady, of course) must know when to wear vulgar lingerie (in her husband's presence) One must never count the months, days and hours before a child is born after a wedding. One must adapt to the idea that people are likely to live together before marriage; one must own a tuxedo, if one is a gentleman; a lady must understand when to wear a floor length gown, and when a cocktail dress will "do." One (if one is a lady) must drink alcohol, but NEVER be drunk in public; one must send wedding gifts--even if one loathes the recipient; one must be a bridesmaid, and not begrudge wearing a totally horrific dress picked out by the bride; one must know when to tell another woman that her "fiance" is cheating; one must not look at the prices on a menu, but still order the chicken course, rather than the beef; one must know when to order food for oneself, rather than waiting for a gentleman to repeat the same into to the waiter; one must never be seen to perspire; etc, etc, ad nauseum.

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13y ago

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