What is an effective method for disiplining your 4-year-old daughter who will not listen and is rebelious to the point of laughing at her punishment?

Answer 1

== == You are definitly not gonna like my answer. There is a REASON she acts this way. She knows someone will give in if she makes it dificult or inconvienient to uphold punishment. Make punishment not fun. BE CONSISTENT. Stay with it. She knows laughing will upset you. Good luck. Here are more answers from WikiAnswers contributors:

* I think you need to clearly establish who is the authority figure. CONSISTENCY is the key here. You cannot back down. She may fuss and cry and whine and hit and kick and scream, but you canNOT back down. There are going to be pleanty of instances where "it's just easier to give her what she wants," but that will only break everything you've been working for. It's going to be hard, but once she realizes that you're in command, and that you're not going to give in, she'll give up.

* Remember, she's only a 4-year-old child, and you are a ___ year-old adult! There's no reason that she should be running the show.

* (Please remember to stay calm. Use a firm voice when dealing with her, but don't scream. You don't want to scare or oppress her, and I would hope that you would never resort to hitting or spanking.)

* All the above answers are giving good advice. I would also stress that it is important that you sit down with your child when she is calm and make sure she understands what your rules are. You might even want to let her feel like she is participating in making them. Make them simple and as positive as possible, such as "We pick up our things" rather than "We don't leave our things laying around." Another example is "I will say nice things to others" rather than "I will not backtalk mommy." Pick the most important things you want her to do, and don't make more than 5 or 6 rules. Explain why you have the rules you do, and set consequences for each one. Whatever the rules and consequences are, BE CONSISTENT in following them and do it calmly and matter-of-factly. If she yells, screams, and laughs, don't react emotionally. Simply let her know you are not going to given in, and DON'T GIVE IN! It would be a very good thing to give this some thought and have the rules ready before you sit down to discuss them with her. Also, keep in mind that a 4-year-old's attention span can be short. If you see she is not attentive or getting bored, simply let her go on to something else and come back to the rules later. You might even choose one rule, discuss it with her, give her a couple of days to have some success with that one, and then add another one. Be sure to reward success, too! Praise and hugs would probably be good, and tangible rewards will work, too. In school, teachers often make "behavior" boards and put stars or stickers on it when children are successful. When they reach a certain number, they get a small toy or other reward. Children that age love them! It's probably not good to overdue the tangibles, though. You eventually want your daughter to obey the rules for inner reasons, not to get something. Some parents when dealing with the behaviors you describe, have a "3 strikes" rule. First, they let the child know they are not obeying the rule. Second, they give them a reminder. Third, they administer whatever consequences were stated when the rules were made. One more thing, don't ever refer to your child as "bad" or "being bad." It's much better to let the child know she is making a bad choice or doing something that should not be done. Choices is really a good term to use because making choices is what life is all about, and it gives the child control of her actions and the consequences for inappropriate behavior. It's important to your daughter that you stop the behavior NOW! There will come a day when it's going to be too late.