Positive Parenting

Answer 1

When your child is whining or throwing a tantrum, it's hard to follow positive parenting principles. Your nerves begin to unravel, and the more you try to talk to and reason with your child, the worse things get. However, have you noticed that you tend to handle your frustrated and angry child more calmly when no one else is around? That's because you tend to have fewer expectations when you're by yourself. When you're around your friends and your family, it's easy to fall prey to frustration, because you're likely catering to others' expectations instead of focusing on your child.

A Child's Demands

When you feel like your child is demanding a great deal of you, consider that those demands are most often self-imposed. When parenting, no one is forcing you to act a particular way; you are free to choose your path. When you remember that, parenting seems less overwhelming. For example, if you feel as though you are supposed to discipline your child a certain way, you may feel resentful toward your child. When you embrace the idea that you can choose how to discipline your child, you will feel more satisfied with the way you respond to his or her actions.

Right vs. Wrong

Parenting decisions are not inherently right or wrong. If you convince yourself that there is a right or a wrong way to parent, you may be easily irritated by your child's actions. Instead of following an arbitrary parenting ideal, listen to your child and respond according to the specifics of the situation. When you put aside your judgment and embrace flexibility, you will find creative solutions to your parenting challenges.

Rhythm

Following your child's rhythm will help prevent struggles and tantrums. Children don't have the same reasoning skills as adults do; they tend to do what feels good. If children are doing something enjoyable, abruptly changing their rhythm may result in an outburst. If you try to match their rhythm, you can steer them in the direction you want without making them feel like they have lost their own freedom.

Positive parenting relies on a sense of freedom. If parents or children feel stifled, they may respond to demanding situations with frustration and irritability. When parents respond to their children's needs with caring and sensitivity, everyone is better off.