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ANSWER The best way to find out if your husband is cheating is just to ask. If you know your husband then you will be able to tell if he is lying. Most men cheat with someone they work with, so make friends with their co-workers and they will let you know. You will hear rumors but they may not always be true. So trust your instinct! If your husband is truly cheating the the truth is you already know. Most importantly, men almost never actually love women for long periods of time. Truly, I would cheat on my husband, but I love him.

Answer

First, you have a gut feeling, one of suspicion and mistrust. Then, you might notice changes in his behavior; in the quality of his clothing or cologne, along with protectiveness of his communication devices (computer, cell phone, etc.). You also might notice a change in his routine, and making excuses for coming home late, or needing to travel. Increased defensiveness to your inquiring questions (rather than reassuring statements and empathic, affectionate responses) becomes more likely, as well.

If you have been begging for him to help out around the house for EVER, and he suddenly wants to do all of the laundry, it could be because he doesn't want you sifting through his clothes and finding evidence.

If he's never worked an hour of overtime in his life and all of a sudden is putting in long hours - unless he just got a promotion or started a new job this could be a sign he's making time for something or someone besides you.

If he's never been concerned about his personal grooming habits or weight, and all of a sudden he wears cologne, manscapes, and joins a gym - he could be trying to be sexy for you but it's entirely possible he's trying to be sexy for someone else.

If his car used to resemble a dumpster, and suddenly it's spotlessly clean all the time - especially if he removes the child seat(s) when the kids aren't going to be around - it's might be he doesn't want you to know who has been in the car or that person to know you and your family exist.

If he never was very affectionate or surprised you with gifts for no reason - and now he's greets you with kisses and roses - he could just be making up for lost time but it's also possible he feels guilty about something.

The key to all of this is behavioral patterns. If your guy has been talking about wanting to make some changes for the better, and finally acts on it, be supportive until you have solid fact to the contrary. Don't go hiring a PI if he does one or maybe even two of these things but, just make mental notes and watch out for the biggest sign of ALL:

Sudden need for personal privacy is a HUGE clue. If he never used to behave in the following way and now: takes phone calls privately, changes and doesn't save his computer passwords, freaks out if you touch his phone or computer, and gets defensive when you ask normal things like "how was your day?" or "how come you were late?" - WATCH OUT - especially if there are other signs. It's possible he's just planning a surprise party for you, but it's also possible he's been having a party with someone else.

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7y ago

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