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Because once the behavior is identified, the victim can leave and remove herself from the situation, but those who continue are now taking part in their own abuse. Most advice regarding abusers tell the victim to get away from the situation, but most of them don't. Yes, the abuser causes the problem and is At Fault, but the victim is an enabler who allows it to continue. If someone is being abused, she should leave, although many people consider that to be blaming the victim. Unfortunately, it's just a realistic approach to dealing with the problem.

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