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Briefly, a Russian application wouldn't stand a snowball's chance in hell. Russia's membership would totally overthrow the balance of power within the EU, since for one thing Russia is geographically bigger than all of the EU countries taken together, many of whom are already highly dependent on Russian gas and oil as it is. Certainly the eastern European States within the EU - only fairly recently liberated from Soviet domination - would consider this a nightmare scenario and would fight it tooth and nail and ultimately simply block membership.

Other considerations, such as the questionable quality of Russia's democratic institutions, of the freedom of Press, of the judiciary system and of the solidity of Russia's financial institutions pale into insignificance compared to the complete upheaval of the EU that Russia's membership would cause.

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