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What dynamics can a panda do?

Updated: 4/28/2022
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12y ago

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Pandas are a mystery of nature. If whales are the answer, then pandas are the question.

What is a giant panda a/k/a "panda"?

A panda is someone who eats, shoots, and leaves. And occasionally makes you laugh.

Aren't pandas inefficient, piebald buffoons who are an evolutionary dead end?

Yes. That is why there are fewer than 3000 (fewer than1600?) in the world.

Then how are pandas not extinct yet?

Pandas are beloved, because they are ridiculously, scientifically cute. They aren't just adorable freaky bears that bark in the bamboo forest. Their entire evolutionary strategy (by intelligent design!) was to sit on their thumbsand wait around until there were humans to love them andbe responsible for them despite all of their inefficiencies and mysteries.

So how do pandas live their whole lives?

royrod: "You know how sometimes you walk into a room and go... now why did I come in here? That's how [pandas] live their whole lives."

Seriously, what do pandas do all day?

Pandas spend 16+ hours a day foraging for food, eating, and crapping. Much like CEOs.

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12y ago
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