Do narcissists get worse or better as they get older?
The narcissist ages without mercy and without grace. His withered body and his overwrought mind betray him all at once. He stares with incredulity and rage at cruel mirrors. He refuses to accept his growing fallibility. He rebels against his decrepitude and mediocrity. Accustomed to being awe-inspiring and the recipient of adulation - the narcissist cannot countenance his social isolation and the pathetic figure that he cuts.
As a child prodigy, a sex symbol, a stud, a public intellectual, an actor, an idol - the narcissist was at the centre of attention, the eye of his personal twister, a black hole which sucked people's energy and resources dry and spat out with indifference their mutilated carcasses. No longer. With old age comes disillusionment. Old charms wear thin.
Having been exposed for what he is - a deceitful, treacherous, malignant egotist - the narcissist's old tricks now fail him. People are on their guard, their gullibility reduced. The narcissist - being the rigid, precariously balanced structure that he is - can't change. He reverts to old forms, re-adopts hoary habits, succumbs to erstwhile temptations. He is made a mockery by his accentuated denial of reality, by his obdurate refusal to grow up, an eternal, malformed child in the sagging body of a decaying man.
It is the fable of the grasshopper and the ant revisited.
The narcissist - the grasshopper - having relied on supercilious stratagems throughout his life - is singularly ill-adapted to life's rigors and tribulations. He feels entitled - but fails to elicit narcissistic supply. Wrinkled time makes child prodigies lose their magic, lovers exhaust their potency, philanderers waste their allure, and geniuses miss their touch. The longer the narcissist lives - the more average he becomes. The wider the gulf between his pretensions and his accomplishments - the more he is the object of derision and contempt.
Yet, few narcissists save for rainy days. Few bother to study a trade, or get a degree, pursue a career, maintain a business, keep their jobs, or raise functioning families, nurture their friendships, or broaden their horizons. Narcissists are perennially ill-prepared. Those who succeed in their vocation, end up bitterly alone having squandered the love of spouse, off-spring, and mates. The more gregarious and family-orientated - often flunk at work, leap from one job to another, relocate erratically, forever itinerant and peripatetic.
The contrast between his youth and prime and his dilapidated present constitutes a permanent narcissistic injury. The narcissist retreats deeper into himself to find solace. He withdraws into the penumbral universe of his grandiose fantasies. There - almost psychotic - he salves his wounds and comforts himself with trophies of his past.
A rare minority of narcissists accept their fate with fatalism or good humour. These precious few are healed mysteriously by the deepest offense to their megalomania - old age. They lose their narcissism and confront the outer world with the poise and composure that they lacked when they were captives of their own, distorted, narrative.
Such changed narcissists develop new, more realistic, expectations and hopes - commensurate with their talents, skills, accomplishments and education. Ironically, it is invariably too late. They are avoided and ignored, rendered transparent by their checkered past. They are passed over for promotion, never invited to professional or social gatherings, cold-shouldered by the media. They are snubbed and disregarded. They are never the recipients of perks, benefits, or awards. They are blamed when not blameworthy and rarely praised when deserving. They are being constantly and consistently punished for who they were. It is poetic justice in more than one way. They are being treated narcissistically by their erstwhile victims. They finally are tasting their own medicine, the bitter harvest of their wrath and arrogance.
Based on my book "Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited"
� 2003 Lidija Rangelovska Narcissus Publications
They are shallow and do not accept age well. And no, their attitude doesnt get any better either. It gets far worse, especially if they have any addictions.
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The outlook is bleak for recovery. A Narcissists grandiosity can be confronted in small windows of crisis such as Divorce or Bankruptcy. In that small frame of time a Narcissi…st may be confronted with their true selves and seek answers. Chances are any chance at therapy would be to re-build their Narcissistic self and become worse than before. Narcissists fear aging and sometimes that can prove to humble the hard edges of the Narcs empty world.
Absolutely. I've seen it with my own eyes, coz my grandma is one. when people grow older, they want their loved ones to get closer...but things are just the opposite with her.… Whenever we visit her, we can see the irritation on her face, as if all love for her own family & relatives are now lost. On the other hand, she wants me or anyone from the family to sleep beside her at night, coz she's afraid no one's gonna be their if she dies at night. The more days pass by, the more she tortures people emotionally & makes people cry. Everyone wants to stay away from her, including all her children but my father. Dad says, she's gonna pass away anytime so why not keep her happy till then. I can never convince dad how impossible it is to keep her happy, no matter how much we try. She's becoming worse day by day in terms of attitude, selfishness, feelings etc. She's the most heartless person I've ever seen in my entire life & I'm never gonna forgive her for hurting my family.i m ashamed to call her a family.she was never a good mother nor wife, let alone a good grandma or a person.
They need someone who is as focused on them as they are on themselves. So they'd be better off with someone with really low self esteem, or just someone who is a real giver, a…nd wouldn't mind never getting anything in return.
The reason why your cramps get worse as you get older is mostlikely due to the shifting of hormone levels in the body. Not allwomen find that their menstrual cramps worsen wit…h age and someforms of contraception can actually make cramps lessen ordisappear.
Maybe worse, since young people's nervous system are functioning well ... old ones can get tired in processing ideas because they are old... SPP.
No They only have better relationships with themselves..... new answer: if 2 people have different forms of (pathological)narcissism they can have a relatively successful rela…tionship buttwo cerebral narcissists, for example, would be fighting in notime.
Why do i feel sorry for my narcissistic husband when he treats me so bad he has gotten worse the older he gets?
You have a condition known as codependency. We suggest that you poke around the Codependents Anonymous site, and consider attending a few meetings. http://www.codependents.o…rg/
Yes i think so, because when you get older you understand more things and you get more upset when you get bullied because you have deeper feelings.
Bolo markings or similar I assume? They usually all but disappear as they grow older. Although if a puppy has white marking as a pup, it will be more inclined to get white hai…rs when it is older.
Absolutely! Did you ever hear of liquid courage? This is a double wammy!
No; smoking damages the body across a period of time. The longer a person has smoked, the greater the risk of lung cancer and health complications.
Quite often, yes. However, MS may progress very slowly (in 1/3 of patients), moderately (in another 1/3 of patients) and more quickly (in yet another 1/3 of patients). These a…re the three prognostic courses of MS.
yes because as they get older there ears do not hear as well
Sometimes it may get better but if it does get better then the child will be come more independent about themselves and probably won't talk to other people that much as they d…id before. It may get worse also because your not careful about what shots to use then the child might get really sick. Some medication will can go into there body and make it worse or better.
It's been longer since your last bath.