A relative is being abused by his own kids while they defend their abuseive mom the dad never hit the kids and the mom did so regularly along with strong verbal abuse is this a case of stockholm syndr?

Answer 1

Yes, there is the component of Stockholm Syndrome. The children turned on one of the victims of their mom's abuse (their father) as a way to deal with the abuse that was done to them, because growing up, they felt they had no way to escape from the situation. Possibly they blame the father more, because they felt that, as an adult, he could have stopped their mother's abuse towards them all, but he did nothing. They feel he earns their contempt because they perceive that he was an accomplice to their abuse. Talking to a counselor who specializes in therapy for abuse victims will help the father gain perspective and also learn on how to disengage from abusive relationships.

Their mother (the abuser) was probably inconsistent in her behavior -- alternating between abusive and loving behaviors towards her children, further scewing their perspective. However to the kids, the abusive parent seems more in control, and therefore she must be appeased.

In this situation, the children will also display hostile or negative reactions towards other relatives or friends who try to discuss or assist with the situation. They may also downplay the abuse that went occurred.

There are no simple or timely solutions to abuse . The father, for his own health, needs to leave the marriage, end contact with his spouse and children, and seek some professional counseling. Only then will he be able to attempt some sort of open communication with his children, if they are willing to come to terms with what has happened.