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Do adults with Asperger's Syndrome confuse friendliness with someone coming on to them or flirting?
Wiki User
∙ 14y ago
Yes. I'm 45 years old and have Asperger's Syndrome (AS), and still can't tell the difference. A woman had to be overt and aggressively assertive to me before I got the hint. Subtle hints never registered with me.
A:
Absolutely! Some people with AS do not experience many overtures of friendship, so when a person tries to be friendly, the person with AS could assume it indicates a romantic interest. Other people with AS are completely oblivious to everything less than a direct statement of romantic interest. Flirting involves nonverbal language, such as length of eye contact, positioning of the body, personal space, touching of hands or arms, tone of voice, etc., which people with AS do not instinctively grasp, so it is easy to misjudge intent or to ignore the nonverbal aspect entirely.
People without AS can misjudge the intent of a person with AS, assuming romantic interest when the person is trying to be friendly or assuming friendliness when the person is attempting to flirt. The person with AS, in addition to having difficulty understanding nonverbal language, can exhibit misleading nonverbal language or so little that the other person is uncertain of the intent.
When Asperger's Syndrome is part of the equation, either person can have difficulty recognizing the intent of the other.
A:
I often get the two mixed up. Being in Adolescence, there are idiot girls walking round the school saying "Hiya, Sexy!" to everyone they see. I still don't know whether it's a flirt or insult but have merely regarded it as an insult. Then some lad said "God, your tidy.". I took that as a flirt and walked away instantly (thinking he was trying to flirt with me, and I was walking away as a sign of "I'm not a homosexual") - but could he have meant a compliment meaning "clean" or "neat" in a non-flirty way? Then there's times my friends have said a comment I thought was flirty, getting creeped out, just to reassured they meant it in a friendly way.
Wiki User
∙ 14y ago
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