I think narcissists subconsiously classify their romantic relationships in two types; those who are "inferiors" who are meant to worship them and those who are "great" who might understand them and who are worthy of setting boundaries and limits. Narcissists are not ever really attracted to the "inferiors". If the inferiors ever contradict them, they are disposable. They treat inferiors differently than "great" people. Inferiors aren't allowed to set limits and make rules for the kind of treatment they receive from the. If they try to tell the narcissist they didn't appreciate their treatment, the narcissist laughs at them. Narcissists are attracted to the "greats" and might actually try to get a "great" back after offending him/her. "Greats" are those who can help the narcissist project his great image to the outside world. So, if you want a narcissist to be attracted to you, you should create an image or mirage that a narcissist can brag about to his friends. The "truth" about your accomplishments can be stretched a little. If you know a cerebral narcissist, you should inform him of your great cerebral goals and accomplishments. Buff up your job resume. Going out with him is almost like interviewing for a job (i.e., I received this GPA at Harvard and discovered the cure for cancer. I am also running a marathon and hope to give a piano concert a Carnegie Hall.) If you know a somatic narcissist, you should get a boob job or plastic surgery if you feel like he thinks you're his "inferior". If you look homely compared to your narcissist - cerebral or somatic, fix it by going on a diet, buying nice clothes, or getting cosmetic surgery. Almost any image is fixable in modern day times. Your image that you project to the world should be equally "great" if you want equal treatment and respect from your narcissist. Then, once your worth is almost equal to his, start setting boundaries and let him know he is disposable when he pulls one of his tricks. Maybe even leave him. There is nothing that makes a narcissist fall in love faster than him taking a little abuse and coming back for more. Narcissists are attracted to submissive people who worship them and have the same belief that only some people are "worthy". For instance, if a narcissist has the belief that people are only "OK" if they make all A's in school, then he is attracted to a submissive person who believes that she must make A's. Whether she makes the A's or not does not really matter. She must understand how hard it is to be as great as the narcissist and absolutely worship him and his screwed up beliefs. So, if you want to attract a narcissist, first you must be submissive and "safe" for him to approach. You should dress in washed out submissive colors, have submissive body language with a slight head tilt and with your toes slightly pointed inward, and your voice should be soft. You should give him a lot of eye contact and individual attention. You should say things that focus on the narcissist's greatness. You should compliment him on whatever traits he values most in himself. If he has certain goals, you should have similar goals or make some up and look upon his goals with utmost awe. You can also devalue those around him who would not measure up in his belief system. He loves to feel superior to people around him. The real question here is why would you want a narcassist attracted to you? They will never like you, they will only like what you can do for them. I wouldn't waste my time. This guy will use you up, spit you out and then be baffled as to why you don't want to do it all over again.
No. I find men ocassionally attracted to me without knowing I'm gay, and they're attracted to my look, my personality, my independence, who I am. As for the men that are interested in me BECAUSE I'm gay, I might have to lean towards yes. I'm this exotic, challenging, unconquerable -thing- to them. I've read that narcissists are often attracted to people they find are a challenge to have or conquer.
There is no cure. Intensive talk therapy may help but the narcissist must recognize their problem and be willing to make changes. The problem is that by their very nature a narcissist cannot admit there is anything wrong with them or their behavior.There is no cure. Intensive talk therapy may help but the narcissist must recognize their problem and be willing to make changes. The problem is that by their very nature a narcissist cannot admit there is anything wrong with them or their behavior.There is no cure. Intensive talk therapy may help but the narcissist must recognize their problem and be willing to make changes. The problem is that by their very nature a narcissist cannot admit there is anything wrong with them or their behavior.There is no cure. Intensive talk therapy may help but the narcissist must recognize their problem and be willing to make changes. The problem is that by their very nature a narcissist cannot admit there is anything wrong with them or their behavior.
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