How do you remove your 21 year old from your house?

Answer 1

If your child is like mine, he continues to show you he's not interested in improving his situation, i.e., school, attitude, etc and does not follow the house rules, and uses drugs despite efforts to quell this, I totally understand your desire to "nudge' him from the nest. This is likely best for him, you and others living in the home. When my son is 18 I plan to do this. 1 week after his 18th birthday, I will hire a moving company to pack and move his things to a storage unit nearby. I will have a security company change all the locks the same day. I will give him a small amount of money to live for a month, the key to the unit (couple months paid for) and a list of places to call, including homeless assistance, YMCA, Military, etc.

Answer 2

Depending upon the jurisdiction in which you live, you may have to go through formal eviction procedures to force your child out of the house. Check at the your local Clerk of Court office for the proper procedure to get an order of eviction.

Answer 3

Sadly, any adult child willing to overstay their welcome is well familiar with their legal rights. In other words, if you aren't careful, they can insist on thirty days notice, and then steal all your stuff while your working. (I assume the obvious, that the "child" is not working.)

I'm assuming, too, that you've already made your wishes plain. So make it easy on yourself.

1. Stop feeling guilty. He/she is an adult, it's time for a job and a place of their own.

2. Do not call the police, they'll say you have to give an eviction notice, and he/she will probably rob you blind in that time period.

3. Give no more warnings, he/she will just use that to prepare against you.

4. On a day you know they'll be out for awhile, load all the kid's belongings up and have them taken to storage. If you are rich, have them taken to an apartment that you rented for the kid and paid a month's rent for. If you are poor, have the stuff taken to the dump, or the yard of one of his friends.

(As a compromise, you can rent a cheap motel room by the week, usually for $100 or so. True, it's in a bad neighborhood. But it will hold all his stuff, and give him a place to stay for at least a week. And he can't say you put him out on the street!)

5. Change the locks on all doors. Make sure that there is nothing of his in the house. Know where your lease or title is, saying who is allowed to be there. Be outside, with the doors locked behind you, and a close friend with you. More than one friend, if you can. When he shows up, tell him where his stuff is, and that he no longer lives there.

6. Hopefully, that's it. But if it goes south, let him know that if he doesn't leave, you will file for a protective order against him. And that if he goes into the house, you'll call the police. If he tries calling the police - leave! Think about it. The police arrive, you are gone, the house is locked, and the overaged "child" is wanting them to help him/her go in! They won't break down the door for the kid! And since you're not there to be questioned, you don't have to lie.

7. Now, if upon arriving home, he/she actually broke in, don't go in, simply call the police, and with the title/lease and your friend to back you up, have him/her arrested. They may not actually arrest him/her. But given that there will be signs of a forcible entry, they won't be pestering you about "thirty days notice" either. You see, if he disagreed, he was supposed to sue you, not commit breaking and entering.

Now. Relax. It usually never gets past step five.