If the father of your unborn child has been making threats regarding custody and child support what rights does he have?

Sadly I'm going through this exact situation right now. I'm incredibly frustrated with the state and its law (Montana) because no one seems to care that he is such a horrible man. From what everyone has told me, the bastard gets rights, no matter what I think. If you are in a state like Montana its a "joint custody" state so if you are going to put his name on the birth certificate, he automatically has at the very least visitation rights. They make you write up a parenting plan which is good for a year and unless you can prove somehow that he is unfit, he can then ask for more time/rights/accessibility.

I was smart enough to get a restraining order against him, which does give me some leverage, but i don't know if he's actually planning on following through with his 'threats' of fighting me for custody, etc. because he's such a shifty, cheating liar. So, if you can, find out for sure if he is going to fight you, and make sure to try to document everything he says because you can always use it in court. I tried to demand he only speak to me if a third party was present (but if the father youre speaking of is anything like mine he will refuse because he knows it'll only make him look bad).

What I've had to resort to now, since the rest has failed me, is hope that he'll slip up and ruin things for himself. I'm going to write up as strict a parenting plan as possible and hope that the courts will accept it, and maybe he'll be intimidated by it. But what it mostly comes down to is that you have to do what you think is best for the child.

Mostly, 'The Right to Remain Silent'. You're being harassed... threatened... emotionally abused. He would have to prove he is the father before even thinking about any 'rights'. Once that's done to everyone's satisfaction, He's responsible for child support, whether or not he has any visitation or custody rights. 'Deadbeat Dads' can wind up doing hard time in many states. First and foremost, protect yourself- and your baby. Call the police; Get a restraining order.

Why do persons always assume the dad is "deadbeat?" Perhaps the father in question here is concerned for this unborn child's welfare and it is the mother that has issues, hence him making "threats regarding custody."

look at the facts, for the most part the only parent being unwilling to look at the welfare of the child and not selfishly at their own well being or how they can hurt the other parent is the dad. it's just a fact. stats don't lie


I teach fathers how to prepare for a custody challenge with what is always a "Gatekeeper Mom". In 100% of the cases, any expression of desire for custody rights has been perceived as a threat to the mother's well being. I also teach them when and how to record conversations, so I heard the evidence.

Gatekeeper mothers perceive any attempt to reduce their total control as a threat. Claims of being a bad or abusive father outnumber the stars in the sky. In 60% of these cases, when fathers file for custody, they are accused of child sexual abuse. In nearly 100% of the cases, claims of domestic violence, or fear of violence, is made. The claim can be made that something happened up to two years prior to the custody filing, with no evidence required. Restraining orders are easy to get and judges who require proof can face possible dismissal from the bench.

The best example was in the news. Colleen Nestler of Santa Fe, NM was given a restraining order due to the man sending her unwanted messages by way of nearly 45 minute long video recordings. She was not asked to produce the recordings as evidence.

It cost David Letterman over $10,000 in attorney fees to get the order set aside.

In a local case, after the father filed for custody, the mother filed for a restraining order claiming that in five months previous he had shot out her car windows than called her later to brag about it. She had the police report to prove it. He had called her that night, as he had a recording of it. It was to talk to his daughter. After hanging up, the house phone was destroyed.

A tree branch had crashed through the roof, penetrating all the way to the basement. As he did with all his daily activities, he kept a daily journal, so he knew who to call as witnesses. His custody challenge was denied because at the time, under the VAWA, judges were not allowed to consider whether a domestic violence claim was true or not.

I have seen thousands of these in 21 years. If the man is the victim, he can still be accused. A good example of that is at the link below.