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Catholicism

If you are Catholic and want to marry a non-Catholic who has never been baptized and you also live together is any of this going to be a problem if you wish to get married in the Church?

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12/11/2008

I hope you have not lost heart. I am a Catholic Priest in the US, and will try to answer your question as pastorally as possible. You originally asked: "http://wiki.answers.com/Q/If_you_are_Catholic_and_want_to_marry_a_non-Catholic_who_has_never_been_baptized_and_you_also_live_together_is_any_of_this_going_to_be_a_problem_if_you_wish_to_get_married_in_the_Church?" "I think a noisy gong and a clanging cymbal got in the way of your question. I am the product of a mixed marriage, and it had its complications, it is not encouraged that marry outside of their faith. Whether such a marriage is with a Catholic or non-Catholic, Baptized or non-baptized, all partnerships have their ups and downs… sometimes difference can make the union stronger. All marriages performed in the Catholic Church are considered to be valid, unless otherwise proven, by decree, to be otherwise. Living together, prior to marriage is not approved, statistically about a 47% chance that divorce will occur in all marriage in which the parties co-habited prior to marriage. I would subliminally encourage the couple to get married by a JP to protect the wife, as without marriage there is no legal protection. [living together outside of marriage is a "sin" … for us Catholics, living together without benefit of clergy, is a "sin"… If a couple's faith is strong, at the time of the baptism of a child, I am obliged to ask: "Were you married in the Catholic Church." … If the couple answers: "No." I usually ask: "Why? Some mean old monsignor yell at you?" All Catholics, whether living in the state of sin or not, are obliged to attend Sunday Mass. If they are attending Mass, I would ask that they consider "having their marriage recognized" by the Catholic Church. I would further tell them that as long as they were attending Mass, I would have objection baptizing the child. Should they not be going to church, I ask them to delay baptism until they get their spiritual lives in order. If there are children involved, I would do my best to bring the entire family to the church. As far as jeopardizing the souls of a non-Catholic, I almost left the seminary the day one of the members of Opus Dei told me my mother was going to hell because she didn't recognize the Pope as the vicar of Christ on Earth…. That is not the church I belong to. What does it mean to be "fully Catholic" anyway? I wish that there were some way we could put two Catholics through the wringer the same way we so easily put a Catholic and non-Catholics. If living together, I would indeed ask you to live apart. (considering that children are not involved) The Catholic Party must do their best to realign and reconcile themselves to the "Church." Prior to marriage, the couple must attend "Pre-Cana" or other diocesan program as required. There is no need for the non-baptized to convert to Catholicism, but I would urge them to practice their faith to their best, as there faithfulness to their chosen faith itself would give good example.

I hope this affords you some peace of mind. By the way, I was always considered to be one of the more conserative members of my class.