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Answered 2006-07-17 16:29:29

This is more of a personal or moral choice. Sex is not wrong. It just depends on your beliefs system as to what is right for you. that depends on your faith really. I personally feel in order to be truly committed to someon in a marriage you to have experienced men or women. Not just one, so you do not later in life wonder what you could be missing and not knowing if this is it if it could be better or worse and so on. So I feel no it is not wrong with one or even more partners before marriage If you claim to be a Christian, Muslim, or a practicing Jew, then it is wrong (other religions may also have moral rules against such activity, but I am not familiar with them). Practically, the "premarital" part can sometimes fade away. Since the privelages usually reserved for marriage have already been indulged in, then the concept of marriage changes. Marriage no longer has the privelages that it once had - it is now less attractive because the duties/responsibilities/problems of marriage now seem much greater compared to the benefites/privelages/solutions. There have been many young people with good intentions that do exactly as you are suggesting - only to break up with their boyfriend/girlfriend some time before marriage was even proposed. So if you begin having sex outside of the marriage union, then the chances of a good, rewarding marriage (or even marriage at all) diminish. The exclusivity and uniqueness of the experience are lost, never to be reclaimed. As for being sexually experienced - sex is what you make it. In my opinion, the special relationship between a virgin husband and/or wife would outwiegh comparing the sex experiences of prior partners. Please consider holding yourself (and your fiance/boyfriend/girlfriend) to a higher standard than those who surround you, and save yourself for your spouse. And make sure it is your spouse, not just a current bf/gf. There are many other reasons to get married than just the physical privelages, but none as immediate! You need to make sure that he/she is willing to sacrifice their desires for your benefit, as any good spouse would do. In the same manner, you also need to be willing to sacrifice your desires for the betterment of your future family. Often this question is posed by someone whose bf/gf is pressuring them into comprimising what they believe. But many marriage counsellors will tell you that part of marriage is meeting your partner's needs and putting them first. If both partners do this, then the marriage and the relationship will succeed. But if either of you are or become self-serving, then the other's needs will not be met which forces them to be self-serving as well. Soon, neither of you need (or want) the other, and the relationship falls apart. Make sure that your bf/gf does not force you into comprimising what is right. Make sure your bf/gf puts you and your beliefs above what they want right now.

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