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Is it best to try to reason with an abusive partner when he is in a rage or when he is calm and in denial?
Wiki User
∙ 17y ago
Don't bother trying to reason with him at all! Abusers have no rhyme or reason for this behavior and they are fully aware of how they are treating their mate, but like a runaway locomotive they just can't seem to help themselves. Abusers are in a hell of their own. They don't know why they are the way they are, they are in denial, don't care who they hurt and therefore most never seek psychological treatment. An abusive person may have been brought up in an environment with abuse (children see and act out) or something in their personal life like losing a job when they thought they shouldn't have lost the job can anger them and they react with rage. They know they can't act out in society so they come home and take the rage out on their spouse, children, the elderly or even the family pet. They sometimes feel that even society has shunned them or can be bitter that they should be as wealthy as certain other people and become frustrated when they can't attain this goal. Abusers are not "centered" in their lives and therefore a rage brews within them. The only way you can fix this problem is by leaving! You can go to an Abused Women's Center or Mental Health and they will lead you in the right direction. These Centers will keep you safe, give you a place to stay until you get on your feet, give you good counseling and have programs you MUST take to learn the tools of what an abuser is and how to prevent going back to your abuser or choosing another abusive partner. Good luck hon
Wiki User
∙ 17y ago
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How do you get your sister out of a abusive relationship when she is denial and its emotionally killing her?
The key to the problem is your sister and until she realizes that she is in an abusive relationship there is not much you can do. Of course you love your sister, but the best thing you can do is to say nothing and know she has to learn the hard way. This is certainly a difficult task for you as you want to keep her safe and see her happy, but your sister has to see that in herself first.
Are you in an abusive relationship if your boyfriend has cheated and he was in utter shock when you did and how do you get him to change?
No, you aren't in an abusive relationship, but both of you are very immature. Just because one partner cheats doesn't give the other partner the right to do the same thing. If we aren't true to ourselves (we are our own best friend) then the relationships or anything else you endeavor in life is a waste of time. It's time for both of you to move on in different directions. Marcy
Who are the characters in Search for Safety by John Langan?
Ben McKee : The young teen who desperately tries to save him and his mother from the abusive life they are forced to live after his mother gets remarried.Geneva: The mother of Ben who chooses to stay in denial of the abusive life her and her son live.Aunt Fay: the strong put together sister of Geneva who does her best to look out for both her sister and nephew.Larry: the drunk abusive stepfather of Ben who physically and emotionally abuses Ben and his mother.
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If your partner will enjoy a bonsai tree, that's the best reason to give a bonsai tree for Valentine's Day.
How can a woman with a history of abuse dissuade herself of the misconception that her present non-abusive partner will be abusive so that she does not sabotage the potentially healthy relationship?
Abusive behavior directed at a non-abusive partner isn't triggered by any misconception that her partner will be abusive. The abusive behavior is more like an immediate, reflexive defensive act against even the slightest hint or suggestion that a hurtful action may be forthcoming from the "nonabusive" partner, and all this according to a very negative and even paranoid interpretation by the woman of her non-abusive partner's behavior. And then she may never recognize or acknowledge her own abusive behavior unless by some crisis or extraordinary instant of enlightenment she finally sees her behavior as it is. But that isn't enough. She couldn't correct her "misconception" by her self, but by steadfastly and steadily working through the problem in therapy. Some abusers adamantly deny doing any of their abusive acts and will likedly never change. The victims of prolonged, persistent, and sadistic abuse often experience Post Traumatic stress Disorder (PTSD) and other, related, reactions. You need professional help to overcome these after-effects. Joining an online or offline support group also helps. I think you and your partner both need counseling. Especially you. If you have any kids, they need it as much as you do. That is probably the only way to get over your fear. You probably won't be able to do it on your own. It's not your fault, it's just the way the mind works. I totally know how this woman feels..... She must go and seek professional help, to help restructure the way she sees things...or else the fear will dictate her life. I wish her the best and hope that past abusers will not ruin her life. Remind her that she does not need to be ashamed to go for counceling....It part of the process to healing. c.
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To be sweet with your partner you have do things she/he loves most. That is the best way to be sweet to your partner.
What type of law if sister-in-law verbaly abusive?
If your sister-in-law is verbally abusive, there is no law you can invoke to stop her. Your best option is to avoid her.
What is the best way to deal with a nagging partner?
A way is by not taking it personally, as there is always a reason why someone is annoying. Sometimes the person is just agitated or is going through something.
