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My husband told me I am not pretty but have a pretty heart. How do you handle this. He does not want a picture of me?

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December 15, 2010 5:20AM

I'm sorry first of all clearly your feelings were greatly hurt. I would've been crushed !! And I'm not sure how you handle it, but would like to take a stab at it. At first I thought what a louse for hurting his wife that way! But maybe that's not totally the case. If he is the kind of man, that TRULY sees beauty on the inside in everyone rather than the exterior, is so that is a wonderful quality in a human. Albeit his statement cruel. However, his not wanting a picture of you kind of contradicts that doesn't it? Does he carry pictures of anyone else? He married you for a reason, Assuming he is a good man and husband, and your marriage is a good one that you want to keep intact, I would ask him if he is ashamed of you (your appearance)? Is there something YOU can do to improve his physical perception of you? Or do you even want to? Did he ever think you were pretty? Have you changed? What about you isn't ''pretty'' to him? What do you think of your appearance? Are you happy with the way you look? Why did he say this was it in an argument? Is he sorry (at least that) he hurt you? Has he apologized and begged forgiveness? Does he say hurtful things to you a lot? His comment (on the surface) was very rude, hurtful, and just mean. The way I see it your options are, try and fix this talk to him and find out what the real problem is, and then work on fixing it, cry and be hurt and stay hurt, or if he is a louse, start to think about moving on. You're in my thoughts, I hope it works out. Wow, this floors me. Your husband told you that. I wouldn't hold back letting him know how his attributes make you feel. How cold and heartless for him to say this. I would let him know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and just because you don't look like Farrah Fawcett, of course, in her heyday, doesn't mean you are not pretty. I bet there are lots of guys out there that would find you very attractive and maybe you need to find them. He doesn't want a picture, hell, he doesn't deserve one. Boy, this makes my blood boil. I do believe in honesty but what a crappy statement to make to the person that you vowed to love honor and cherish the rest of your life. He did neither of those things in his statement to you and how nice of him to let you know you have a pretty heart. I would turn into a ice cube and let him feel the wrath of a women. How do you know what he feels when you are being intimate, is he thinking that he is with someone else, every time? I would evaluate whether or not he is worth staying with. O yea and while your at it tell him thanks but he needs to get better flirting skills!