Should I a boy who is 10 attend a mother daughter lunch dressed like a girl because I think I can since I've dressed like a girl at Halloween before and I think it would be fun to try?

Answer 1

No - I don't think it is a good idea - this is a luncheon that means something to the people going and to make fun of it would offend people.

I tend to agreeplus you could be very uncomfortable. It sounds lile your adventurous!About 5 years ago I worked at a hair salon and one of the gals brought her son to "bring your daughter to wok day" dressed up like a girl. I think he was about 7 or 8. We dolled him all up and he loved it!

ANSWER

So you did it but he should not huh. I say if you and mom are comfortable with it then go for it. My mom and I used to do mother daughter things all the time since she did not have a daughter. We had dress up weekends and went out to dinner and even beautiy salons for our nails when I was 14. For the summer of my 16 b-day I spent it as a girl and had the best time of my life. But do not mock anything-if you want to be a girl for awhile dress and act like it-no boys underwear-nylon panties, skirts and dresses-all girl or nothing at all. Now my wife, son and I have girl dress up weekends almost every weekend and we all love it just us girls.

Answer

Here is my answer, even though it is 3 years after the original post. I am assuming that the original question was posted in good faith.

I wholeheartedly say, "Yes, Definitely!" However, due to cultural attitudes that, with only a few exceptions, strongly discourage boys dressing like girls, I would encourage you to go only if you can definitely answer "Yes" to all of the following questions.

1. Are you genuinely and sincerely interested in attending this event in the spirit that is intended?

2. Are you willing and able to abide by the standards of behavior that participants in such events are expected to live up to?

3. Do you have an adult woman who is willing to bring you to the event?

4. Are the other participants in the event likely to accept you if someone finds out that you are a boy?

5. Do you have realistic plans on what to do if there are any problems? Are your parents willing to back you up to the hilt if there are problems?

Here is some further explanation about each of these questions.

Sincerity. This means that you truthfully and genuinely want to attend the lunch in the spirit that is intended. You want to participate in the same way that the other mothers and daughters do. It means that you do not want to go because you want to make a scene or cause people embarrassment.

Behavior Expectations. Let's face it, a mother-daughter lunch is a refined social event. That does not mean it has to be stuffy or pretentious. It does mean that everyone who attends is expected to be on her best behavior and use her best manners. This is definitely not an occasion for some kinds of behavior that are typical for many 10-year-old boys, such as roughhousing or using bathroom humor. It also means that you should expect to dress as other girls do who attend this event. Almost always, mother-daughter lunches are dress-up events.

Adult Sponsor. Presumably, your mother will be taking you, although these days if a girl's mother is working at the time of the lunch, the hosts will usually allow another woman to bring you. If your mother can't take you, then perhaps a grandmother, aunt, adult family friend, or even a much older (18 or over) sister could take you. Whoever takes you should be familiar with what is expected of the guests, be willing to teach you what you need to know, and be willing to back you up to the hilt if there are any problems.

Acceptance. One question you and your sponsor need to think about well ahead of time is, "What will happen if someone finds out that I am a boy?" Will this cause a great deal of embarrassment or will the other persons who are there accept you and make you feel welcome on the same basis as anyone else? Almost anything could happen, depending on the attitudes of people in your community and the individuals who are attending this event. If someone finds out that you are a boy and more than a few of the others would be very uncomfortable with that, then perhaps you should not go to the lunch.

Problems. Another obvious question that you need to answer is, "What should we do if anyone becomes angry, embarrassed, or upset that I am a boy and attending this lunch?" You and your adult sponsor need to think through possible problems and what you intend to do about them if they occur. Although it is impossible to think of every possible problem that could occur, you should at least be prepared for the 5 or 6 problems that are most likely to occur.

Here are some thoughts about a few other things.

Clothes. As I said before, this is almost certainly a dress-up event. You should to dress like other 10-year-old girls will at this event, in a nice dress or blouse-and-skirt combination. You should expect to dress in all girl's clothes, from the skin out. That includes underwear, dress (or blouse-and-skirt), shoes, socks, and accessories, such as a purse and jewelry. I will leave it to your mom to decide whether you can wear nylons. At 10, some moms do let their daughter wear nylons, others don't. The same goes for makeup. Personally, I don't think that girls should wear makeup before they are in high school, but some moms will let their 10-year-olds wear makeup, at least on special occasions like this.

Identity. One other question you need to answer is, "Should I go openly as myself or should I assume a girl's name?" I don't mean pretend to be someone else who is a real person. I mean should you use your real name or use a girl's name and actually pretend to be a girl. If you use a girl's name, then you need to be prepared in case someone recognizes you and calls you by your real name. For example, suppose a girl who knows you well is there and, upon seeing you, says, "Oh, hi, David, it's so nice to see you here!" How are going to handle this situation? Obviously, at this point, your cover is blown. Such a situation is not necessarily an impossible one, but it could be somewhat difficult, depending on the attitudes of the people who are there.

In closing, I definitely do not want to discourage you from going to the lunch, but you need to be aware of issues such as these before you go. I hope you get to go, and have fun!