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1. Never talk about the interwebz. Such actions will set you up for a visit from your friendly neighborhood SKETCH cleaner. And trust me, the last thing they will do is wash your clothes.

2. Do what the DECK says. Always. Questioning the DECK will lead to a visit from your local FIREFLY. And trust me, you can't capture this FIREFLY in a jar. Lets just say the smell of smoke is harder to get out then you would think.

3. Always use paper. Never use plastic. I know what you are thinking, "Oh that bagger is so cute," and as you stand there smiling like a monkey on crack, she asks you, "Would you like paper, or plastic" You immediately think she likes you. You shrug, trying to show that your indecisiveness over the material for which you will shlep your foodstuffs in is somehow impressive. She smiles, then says, "I'm out of paper, is plastic okay?" And you think, "Oh the cute bagger, I don't want her to have to walk all the way over to the area where they get more paper bags, ill just go with plastic" WRONG. This kinda thinking will lead to this kind of doing, which will lead to your "accidental drowning while wearing a lead boot" headline in the newspaper. Trust me, lead boots are really rare these days.

4. The most important rule. Bring cassetes with you always. The acronym is BCWUA. You never know when you may need to play a tape, or copy a tape. Ignoring this advice will send you on a one way flight to a 40 dollar taxi which will hightail it to a fast boat which will dock you at the station of the PAIN TRAIN. And trust me. This train don't go "choo choo"

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Q: What are the rules of the interwebz?
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