What is being bipolar like?

Answer 1

Bipolar is one of the affective illnesses and is therefore a disturbance of one's affect (i.e. mood, emotions). It is typically cyclic, alternating (as described above) between manic (i.e. high, energetic, happy) phases and depression (i.e. low, fatigued, sad) phases. But long euthemic (i.e. normal mood) periods are sometimes present between cycles and a few persons diagnosed as bipolar only experience a single manic phase in their entire life with no other symptoms.

Now you will say something like: "But everyone experiences emotional highs and lows, so how can bipolar differ from that?"

To illustrate the difference lets consider the Richter scale used to measure earthquakes. It is a logarithmic scale, with every increase of magnitude by one on the scale the actual intensity of the earthquake is multiplied by a constant. A similar scale (except it must extend in 2 directions, not just 1 because this is a bipolar not a unipolar phenomenon) can be developed to express the range of mood intensity between ordinary mood swings and bipolar mood swings. Remember on this scale (like the Richter scale) each change of magnitude by one on the scale the actual intensity of the manic (+) or depressed (-) mood is multiplied by a constant (e.g. 10 to make it easy but the actual constant is probably different):

+9 >> severe manic psychosis

+8 >> intense manic psychosis

+7 >> mild manic psychosis

+6 >> severe mania

+5 >> intense mania

+4 >> mild mania

+3 >> intense hypomania

+2 >> mild hypomania

+1 >> normal emotional high limit

0 >> stable mood

-1 >> normal emotional low limit

-2 >> mild dysthymia (minor clinical depression)

-3 >> intense dysthymia (minor clinical depression)

-4 >> mild depression

-5 >> intense depression

-6 >> severe depression

-7 >> mild depressive psychosis

-8 >> intense depressive psychosis

-9 >> severe depressive psychosis

So ordinary mood swings are limited to between high magnitude +1 (high intensity 10) and low magnitude -1 (low intensity 10), a bipolar person having mood swings between intense mania magnitude +5 (high intensity 100000) and intense depression magnitude -5 (low intensity 100000) is experiencing changes of mood 10000 more intense than is even possible in a person without bipolar.

In extreme episodes (magnitude ±7 or more) psychotic features appear (i.e. hallucinations and delusions). While hallucinations (i.e. false perceptions) can occur in any of the 5 senses, the most common are auditory (usually voices) not visual. The voices tell you things (e.g. secrets, commands, prophecies) and as you begin to believe them you develop delusions (i.e. false beliefs).

In one of my episodes a few years before I was diagnosed I developed the delusion that I could and had to fix all the problems everywhere in the universe. I was up in about magnitude +8 (high intensity 100000000) and really seriously believed that I had the power to do this. I believed I had somehow obtained access to the nonphysical "tape recorder of universal history" and all I had to do was rewind the "tape of history" to a trigger event for some current problem, make a small edit to that event, then play the tape back at high speed to catch up to now then see the final result now. I had been very busy for several days winding this "tape" back and forth when the police officer arrived at my apartment to take me to the emergency room for an involuntary hospitalization (but I was not diagnosed correctly then). While I do not recall what I actually said I continued winding the "tape" back and forth and fixing the universe for the entire ride, and giving the police officer a running commentary of my progress! When I arrived at the emergency room they put a light weight straitjacket on me, which immediately triggered the delusion that I was Houdini and they had just issued an escape challenge to me! After maybe 2 hours waiting (and trying to get out of the straitjacket unsuccessfully) I did something they thought might be dangerous and they removed the straitjacket and put me in 4-point restraint on a bed in a small room connected to the emergency room, for the rest of the night (I spent almost half that night screaming various nonsense names and "secret codewords" that the voices kept telling me before falling asleep)! I was finally admitted to the psychiatric ward in the morning.

I was diagnosed with bipolar in 1996 after having several episodes beginning in late 1979. In my various episodes my mood rose as high as about magnitude +8 (high intensity 100000000) and fell as low as about magnitude -7 (low intensity 10000000). I experienced both auditory (voices) and olfactory (smells) hallucinations. The voices I heard consisted of about 5 distinctly different voices with unique personalities and attitudes (some were very scary but one very quiet one had the power to suddenly break in make all the others shut up and whisper something that I always felt I could completely trust and in many cases actually were very useful). Since 1996, the medications I take have kept me stable with no significant episodes, with the limits of the occasional mood swing now never exceeding about magnitude +2 (high intensity 100) to about magnitude -4 (low intensity 10000). While I have never attempted suicide I have had the thoughts much of the time starting in about 1973 when I was in High School, but in 2008 and 2013 the thoughts were getting so intense and I was about magnitude -4, that I voluntarily hospitalized myself to prevent something from happening.

That is what being bipolar is like.

Answer 2

It can be a very difficult disorder to live with if left untreated. People with this disorder suffer through radical emotional changes and mood swings, from manic highs to depressive lows. The majority of bipolar individuals experience alternating episodes of mania and depression.

Answer 3

Half the time you feel great, with lots of energy and half the time, you're miserable. And even when you feel great, there's the very real chance that you'll go too far "up" and become psychotic, seeing hallucinations or getting weird thoughts and impulses. You spend all of your money and do crazy, dangerous things that you wouldn't do if you were thinking right. When you're depressed, you sometimes want to kill yourself, and many bipolar people do commit suicide.

The only way to deal with Bipolar disorder is to have a good psychiatrist to handle your medication, and a good therapist to help you handle the rest of your problems.

Answer 4

A brick that suddenly lifts and then smashes back on your head. You feel so happy, which only make it hurt more through depression.