What should you do if you are pregnant but too young to have a baby?

=== === The people here have previously only chosen one or two of three answers, when number one, there are three to consider, and number two, the answers had one or no facts, were one-sided, and/or were very opinionated and may have been the best choice for that one, but it may not be for the asker/s of this question.

But understand that this question is a very difficult one to answer because we, as complete strangers, know nothing about your past, how you became pregnant, your family life, your age, whether or not you do drugs or what kind, and hundreds of other factors that could be very important to answer this question. Because of this, you will end up deciding this for yourself, no matter how much advice you receive.

First, you have to know, "How young is too young?" Are you physically too young? Mentally? There is no magic number that says, "Hey, it's safe to have a baby." If you are eleven, then your answer is mostly very limited, but if you are nineteen, maybe you can manage to carry a baby up to term, and perhaps take care of him or her... if you are mentally ready, that is.

You would have to know yourself well enough to decide if you are "too young." Take a step back, look at yourself, and decide, "Am I too young?" You should be confident in this answer; you know yourself better than anyone else.

Now, after you decide this, you have a few options, as I've said before. There is no right answer for you to pick; however, there is a wrong answer. That wrong answer won't be an "opinion thing" of anyone else here but yourself. This is a decision of what's right for you, not what's right for every person who answers this question.

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The first option, and the one that most would recommend, is to carry the child up to term and care for him or her without adoption or abortion. This is much easier on your mental health in most cases. There is always the risk of depression after the birth of a child, and this option is best for that because the other options increase the risk. In this option, you never have to worry about where this child could be, what could've been... and etc., etc.

Now, you have to consider your family life. Do you have a good support network of parent/s, brother/s and/or sister/s, aunt/s, uncle/s, grandparent/s, etc.? All of these play a role. If you are under twenty and/or single, you may want or need to have a very supportive family or at least some very close friends that can help you raise this child. If you have no support network, then this may not be the best plan, but that doesn't mean you have to completely give up this idea. If you really want to have a baby and you really believe you can, go for it!

Now, for the beginning question you have presented, "What if you are too young?" Well, depending on what too young is for you, you should think about this. If you are physically too young, you can really damage your body and cause both you and the child harm, and the possibility is, you may never be able to have a child again, let alone a healthy one. And, of course, there is a risk of death that is always there is you are physically too young. If you are mentally too young, then how can you help this child learn? What advantages can this child receive from you? Will this child be in a lot of stress because of this? These are all things you need to keep in mind.

This option is the most common one used, but some women really can't do this.

Adoption is, by all means, humane, so don't let the sound of it or what anyone says about it discourage you. Though there is a chance of not being able to talk to your child, at least you know that he or she is most likely living a better life than what it might've been. And there will always be the chance of him or her asking to see you, which is never there in abortion. This child will have been given the well deserving chance, but, just like with keeping the child at your younger age, there are downfalls to consider.

You need to remember that this is a cruel world, and you never know who your child will end up with. Now, that isn't to say that the chance of a bad parent is high, since the chance is only one in a million, and it isn't to say that the parent will be a mean one, either. It could just be that they, too, are not very educated (which is usually prevented), or maybe can't discipline well, etc.

There is always the chance that you may never meet this child, as well. There are thousands of factors for this, but most of the time, depending on where you live, you are protected from this, but it should still be kept in mind when you consider this option. Also, as I've said earlier, there is always that risk of depression after having a child. This option will increase that chance. And, to add on to that, a mother is extremely attached to their child even before birth, and that makes it very difficult to "give away" a child. This, too, should be kept in mind.

Remember, this option is only if you aren't mentally ready, don't feel ready to raise a child, don't have a good support network and therefore believe that this is the best option.

This is not recommended as a first option by most people for thousands of reasons, rather they be religious, emotional, physical, or other reasons, but if you really believe that you need one, then this is your option.

Again, this is your decision, and no one can force you to do this or not do this. But if your body is too young to have a child safely and you don't want to risk it, this is your best bet. Now, don't let others judge you for this choice if it's yours. They are not you, and they have no business judging your decisions whatsoever. This is your choice.

Of course, being too young is not the only factor for this. What if you were raped? If you are against adoption (which many people are), it would be very difficult to be close to this child, and that would end up making him or her hurt in the long run, and maybe never learn to trust another person very well, have relationship problems, etc. The mother and the child must be able to communicate for him or her to grow up healthily. Also, what if you have an abusive father, and he were to rape you? As terrible as this is, it happens, and if you are one of those unfortunate people, you need to keep in mind that not only will you have a hard time caring for this child, but also this child may have a lot of physical, mental, and emotional problems because of this.

If this option is best for you, go ahead with it, and try not to worry. Keep in mind that this will not make you "pro-abortion," because I can assure you that there is no such thing. Never in my life (or anyone I've talked to about it) have I met a pro-abortion person. If you truly need this, go ahead.

This needs to be your choice. No one on this site or anywhere else can decide this for you, and you shouldn't let them. It might be right for them, but is it right for you? Are you going to be able to live with this decision?

If you are having a difficult time choosing even after researching the topics, the best person to talk to would be a councilor; they can tell you more about the options and what may be best for you, and it would be so much better than coming online and asking questions that could be answered by anyone.

But even a councilor can't decide for you. The final answer will be yours, and it should be one that you agree with most. You are in a tough situation, but you can make the choice of what's right.

I wish you luck.

---- If you have a personal opinion besides these, please put it on the Discussion Page.