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General question, so general answer to the responsibility part: both partners are responsible for the failure (especially if the invoqued reason is "incompatibility" as it is nowadays).

As for who suffers the most, everyone directly connected to it: both wife & husband and the children. However, grown-ups might be able to deal with it over time, but children WILL NEVER, as it will even shape their thinking.

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Q: When marriage fails who is responsible and who suffers?
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