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โˆ™ 2006-03-06 12:02:01
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Q: Who are the childfree?
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Can a teenager be childfree?

The only way to make sure you don't get pregnant is to remain abstinent, which means not have sexual intercourse. If you mean "can a teen get an abortion", then the answer is yes. Go to a Planned Parenthood clinic.


Who can tell me how to make family decals?

You can look at these sites I found online that can help you to make family decals. You should check these sites out decalfusion.com/faq_decals.php , www.reddit.com/r/childfree/comments/sb5u9/family_decals/


What does childless mean?

is defined as the condition of being without children. Childlessness may have personal, social and/or political significance. There are two distinguishable types of childlessness, voluntary and involuntary. Voluntary childlessness, also described as childfree, is a consequence of having made a decision not to reproduce. To be childless not by choice is defined as involuntary childlessness.


At what age can you get a Vasectomy in Florida?

I'm pretty sure in the U.S. you can get a vasectomy at 18. This is the legal age when you have the right to make this choice. Doctors will likely harass you about being too young to make the decision. Ideally doctors would want to give vasectomies to men who are married with 2-3 children. This way they feel there is no loss. The whole childfree thing is still looked down on. Just show up WELL educated about what's going to happen, and make it clear you plan to go for your follow up exams (to check that you're shooting blanks). You need to be very confident and appear so about this. They'll likely send you home with information while making your appointment for a later date. This deters people who aren't 100% sure. But if you show up, they'll see you're serious!


Do most men change their mind about not wanting a baby eventually?

There's no specific answer, because only the individual can choose to change their mind. No other person or relationship can change their mind for them. What is a mistake is to become committed to a person who has made it clear to you that they don't want children, only to later blame them for your own refusal to accept anything other than a myopic belief that they would change their mind for you. Instead of seeing a person's opinion of wanting to be childfree as wrong or eventually changing, view them as a person who knows themselves well and knows what they want from life. They have legitimate reasons for feeling the way they do. Don't rely on a misguided belief that they might 'change'; accept their decision and either accept that you won't have a child with them, no matter how serious the relationship or look for someone who does want to have children. But then again I believe that people who sincerely don't want to be responsible for bringing a child into this world should not have unprotected sex either, otherwise they must bear the consequences and that's why we have the law to hold such people accountable.


What is ambient or stealth abuse?

This is a very tricky tactic used by an abusive person to make you crazy. Since ambient abuse can not sometimes be visible the victim may believe they are so bad and or are going nuts. The abuser may want to isolate their victim from other people as they provide the partner with reality checks such as feedback and reference points. Since their main goal is to de-stabalize the victim's reality they try to ruin these "outside influences." They may gossip about their partner to people in a manipulative manner such as pretending to be concerned for their well being as their partner is acting a little nuts. They wont give there self away to other people, they are calculated in their interactions. People may start to wonder about the partner as the ambient abuser fills their minds with distortions and the abuser apparently my come across as a nice person.AnswerAmbient abuse is the stealth, subtle, underground currents of maltreatment that sometimes go unnoticed even by the victims themselves, until it is too late. Ambient abuse penetrates and permeates everything - but is difficult to pinpoint and identify. It is ambiguous, atmospheric, diffuse. Hence its insidious and pernicious effects. It is by far the most dangerous kind of abuse there is.It is the outcome of fear - fear of violence, fear of the unknown, fear of the unpredictable, the capricious, and the arbitrary. It is perpetrated by dropping subtle hints, by disorienting, by constant - and unnecessary - lying, by persistent doubting and demeaning, and by inspiring an air of unmitigated gloom and doom ("gaslighting").Ambient abuse, therefore, is the fostering, propagation, and enhancement of an atmosphere of fear, intimidation, instability, unpredictability and irritation. There are no acts of traceable explicit abuse, nor any manipulative settings of control. Yet, the irksome feeling remains, a disagreeable foreboding, a premonition, a bad omen.In the long term, such an environment erodes the victim's sense of self-worth and self-esteem. Self-confidence is shaken badly. Often, the victim adopts a paranoid or schizoid stance and thus renders himself or herself exposed even more to criticism and judgment. The roles are thus reversed: the victim is considered mentally deranged and the abuser - the suffering soul.There are five categories of ambient abuse and they are often combined in the conduct of a single abuser:I. Inducing DisorientationThe abuser causes the victim to lose faith in her ability to manage and to cope with the world and its demands. She no longer trusts her senses, her skills, her strengths, her friends, her family, and the predictability and benevolence of her environment.The abuser subverts the target's focus by disagreeing with her way of perceiving the world, her judgment, the facts of her existence, by criticizing her incessantly - and by offering plausible but specious alternatives. By constantly lying, he blurs the line between reality and nightmare.By recurrently disapproving of her choices and actions - the abuser shreds the victim's self-confidence and shatters her self-esteem. By reacting disproportionately to the slightest "mistake" - he intimidates her to the point of paralysis.II. IncapacitatingThe abuser gradually and surreptitiously takes over functions and chores previously adequately and skillfully performed by the victim. The prey finds itself isolated from the outer world, a hostage to the goodwill - or, more often, ill-will - of her captor. She is crippled by his encroachment and by the inexorable dissolution of her boundaries and ends up totally dependent on her tormentor's whims and desires, plans and stratagems.Moreover, the abuser engineers impossible, dangerous, unpredictable, unprecedented, or highly specific situations in which he is sorely needed. The abuser makes sure that his knowledge, his skills, his connections, or his traits are the only ones applicable and the most useful in the situations that he, himself, wrought. The abuser generates his own indispensability.III. Shared Psychosis (Follies-a-Deux)The abuser creates a fantasy world, inhabited by the victim and himself, and besieged by imaginary enemies. He allocates to the abused the role of defending this invented and unreal Universe. She must swear to secrecy, stand by her abuser no matter what, lie, fight, pretend, obfuscate and do whatever else it takes to preserve this oasis of inanity.Her membership in the abuser's "kingdom" is cast as a privilege and a prize. But it is not to be taken for granted. She has to work hard to earn her continued affiliation. She is constantly being tested and evaluated. Inevitably, this interminable stress reduces the victim's resistance and her ability to "see straight".IV. Abuse of InformationFrom the first moments of an encounter with another person, the abuser is on the prowl. He collects information. The more he knows about his potential victim - the better able he is to coerce, manipulate, charm, extort or convert it "to the cause". The abuser does not hesitate to misuse the information he gleans, regardless of its intimate nature or the circumstances in which he obtained it. This is a powerful tool in his armory.V. Control by ProxyIf all else fails, the abuser recruits friends, colleagues, mates, family members, the authorities, institutions, neighbours, the media, teachers - in short, third parties - to do his bidding. He uses them to cajole, coerce, threaten, stalk, offer, retreat, tempt, convince, harass, communicate and otherwise manipulate his target. He controls these unaware instruments exactly as he plans to control his ultimate prey. He employs the same mechanisms and devices. And he dumps his props unceremoniously when the job is done.Another form of control by proxy is to engineer situations in which abuse is inflicted upon another person. Such carefully crafted scenarios of embarrassment and humiliation provoke social sanctions (condemnation, opprobrium, or even physical punishment) against the victim. Society, or a social group become the instruments of the abuser.Addendum (by a different poster) VI. Cliques of BulliesOf course, ambient or stealth abuse and manipulation can exist in the context of any kind of relationship and intimacy whatsoever. However, sly abuse of power and underhanded manipulation, with bizarre paranoid malicious gossip and all manner of Sadistic instigators and their eager and foolish proxy pawns, are only all the easier given distance, even shunning and social isolation as experienced by targets of relational bullying and harassment, scapegoats, dissidents and whistleblowers.AnswerIn my view, creating a climate of rivalries via unfinished relationsips - such as the allegedly estranged wife the narcissist hangs onto but claims "nothing" is going on, while simultaneously being inappropriately involved considering the relationship is allegedly defunct; failing to disclose & openly conduct what is supposed to be the narcissist's current and primary relationship; insisting on communcating with past girlfriends and making it known one is doing so while agreeing this is not appropriate given narcissit's betrayals, but breaking such agreements; betraying trust by returning to past girlfriends - and so forth, is an example of what is termed "ambient abuse" because an adept and persuasive liar finds excuses and various reasons to explain away all of the above, while continuing to undermine what is supposed to be a primary relationship (and refusing to relinquish such relationship even when caught betraying trust).The end result is a supposedly primary relationship built on nothing but lies, deceit, betrayal, complications and a pervasive atmosphere of fear in the form of intense insecurity.The individual caught in this web of intrigue is naturally hypervigilent and afraid because nothing makes sense. Meanwhile, the narcissist inists "black" is "white".An empty guarantee is often worse than none at all. Bound by exclusive fidelity, never reciprocated, the hapless partner of such a Narcissistic playa becomes only the more isolated and in the dark. The manipulative abuser has not only locked out any possible competition that might press fair value and dignity, but craftily enlisted the mark in the desperate and lonely effort.AnswerHusband to wife: You think you have friends?! Our friends are courteous people. They don't tell you how ridiculous they think you are, but they tell each other...and I've overheard comments. You don't have any friends; just people who feel sorry for your ignorance. People merely tolerate you out of a sense of kindness and feeling sorry for your pitiful appearance and your ridiculous ideas. Perhaps you should practice keeping your mouth shut...and while you're at it, take a look in the mirror. If that looks good to you, you're really more messed up than they think you are. Rather than embarrass me further, why don't you just stay at home so I don't have to be seen with you. After all, I would like to have friends who don't avoid me, just because they don't want to be around you or be put in a position where you're imposing on their patience and tolerance. It might be a good idea for you to consider seeing a psychiatrist. Maybe a professional could get through to you. I'm tired of trying to get through to you. You're just too far gone for me to be able to help you by telling you the truth about yourself. If you don't believe me, that's proof enough that you're beyond help. Why can't you be more like other women I enjoy being around? Do you really think it's attractive to be so boring and stupid?... but you really aren't capable of seeing the truth beyond your fairytale world, are you? You really are a mental case. You're lucky I'm so devoted to our marriage vows...or you'd be on the street. Do you think any other man would have you? Do you think you'd have even friends who pretend to be interested, if I put you out of my house? If you don't have the ability to see beyond your own warped truth, at least, appreciate the fact that I let you stay here...at least, for now. You have a roof over your head, clothes on your back and food in the kitchen. What more do you want? That's gratitude for you!!AnswerI have experienced this several times with different individuals before I realized my pattern and finally found a true friend to marry. Whatever I contributed to the household was never good enough. We could have something that was perfectly edible but he would go out of his way to get a different brand of the same food...and complain about what I brought into the home. Never really saying anything directly to me but just constantly making sure I knew that his preferences were different...and superior. The constant disregard or "forgetting" of my likes and dislikes. "Oh yes that's right; you don't like mushrooms. Well, there's plenty of the sidedish." My husband had a desk job and used to go to work and call home to check on me or tell me what to do or monitor my progress according to what he thought should be done. So annoying.AnswerYour letter mentions "ignoring my intuition". It's odd, because in my two+year relationship with an abuser, I often had feelings of dread and foreboding. Each time I was correct in those feelings, though I did indeed see him those times when he would call, drunk, and ask to see me. My gut was telling me to run in the opposite direction, but I didn't. And each time, there was drama-fights and abuse. There were times when I turned around and went home without seeing him, and I am certain I avoided trouble. In the final months, when he would call and I would return to him, almost immediately I felt sad and wanted to cry. Even if things were good for a week, or two, or three, I knew that nothing would really change. If I ever tried to discuss anything that upset him, he became angry. His apologies were always in some way my fault. Enough is enough. Nothing will change, unless I take the first step-I left him last week. As the Stabbing Westward song goes "If I must be lonely, I think I'd rather be alone". Be strong. Thanks for your input. Beverly I've experienced stealth abuse in my past two relationships, and am now addressing it and becoming healthy again. Neither of these relationships involved the classic abuse pattern (controlling behavior, extreme jealousy etc) but both were abusive none the less.I'm 22 now. The first relationship was when I was 18, with a person a good friend of mine set me up with. He had been interested in me, and I thought he was sweet and that I'd give him a chance. I knew something was wrong but ignored my intuition -- he was immediately very intense about the relationship, talking about marriage and whatnot. He idealized me to the extreme, which I was uncomfortable with, but also routinely tore me down and criticized me, so I felt sad and confused. He also pressured me about sex. A few months into the relationship, he had sex with me against my will. I did not see him any more after that, but did try to resolve things through e-mail, which was a huge, unproductive mistake. There was no resolution with him-- he changed from idealizing me to completely devaluing me, calling me names, telling me I said and did things which in reality were his actions(!), implying I was delusional and making things up because I was in love with him, that he had the power. It was a nasty shock to me that there are really people like that out there.The violation was my first experience having sex.I began another relationship a year and a half later, after I'd spent a significant amount of energy dealing with my last experience and felt ready to have a positive relationship. This time it was my choosing, not a set-up, and I resolved to be true to myself. I felt comfortable enough with my partner to tell him what had happened sexually in my last relationship, and was glad that he seemed so respectful about it. He also respected my space and was reasonable and un-intense. However, several months into my relationship with him he launched into a speech about how he had dated a sexual assault survivor before, and I was similar to her and must act in certain ways because of my experience, and he felt sorry for himself for being burdened with that, and he had more power in the relationship because of it, and I would surely become co-dependent etc. He took a deep vulnerability I had shared with him and threw it back at me.I should have walked away without looking back. But I felt threatened and scared, and sexually insecure.He apologized later, and I believed him and continued trying to have a relationship with him. But I found that I was scared to express my emotions to him. He acted closed off and refused to have intercourse with me, and it was an executive decision rather than something we discussed together. This made my fears about sex much worse, and it didn't do much for my self esteem either. I felt completely humiliated, and that I would never be able to have a healthy relationship. He was physical with me but isolated me emotionally. When we talked about everything that had been happening between us emotionally, and started having open communication and moved into a forgiveness and resolution process, we did make love together-- my first real experience ever. But less than a week later, he cheated on me by having a threesome with my coworker and her boyfriend.I also found out that he had cheated on me with an old girlfriend for several months, and concealed this information from me. He even got tested for HIV knowing that his results might not be fully accurate, deciding the risk was low enough to risk my health.So, I haven't dated anyone who fits the classic abuser profile, but I've dated some pretty mean dudes.And I am someone who is very ashamed of my relationships, and very ashamed that I let all that stuff happen to me, so I don't talk much about it. As you will see I'm even anonymous here. I feel pathetic. I feel like I should have stood up for myself and trusted my gut, walked away and made self-loving, self-respecting choices. But I will now! I learned a lot of hard lessons in a relatively short period of time.It breaks my heart when I think of how many people are being abused. Stay strong everyone.AnswerI am or have been in a relationship just like this. Except it's things like my tone of voice. Example I had my "work voice" on instead of my normal voice so he cut the conversation off. Or he'd say I was listening but that he didn't listen (like there's a distinction some how). Offer to buy me a new bar-b-que but take it off my child support payments. And he only takes 2 out of the 3 kids (the last one is an infant) and he doesn't have the room in his apartment to take all three. But maybe he'll think about taking her on the weekends when he doesn't take the others. So I never have a childfree weekend (there's 5 children in total here). Everything is on his terms.He wants the kids to call him every night so he feels needed but frequently hangs up on them because they didn't talk to him (they're only 2 and 4 years old). If he has the kids and knows I'm going to be renovating the house he'll call several times over the weekend to see if I'm done yet, and how lonely he is. And if he knows that I'm doing something for the kids like make them a quilt or paint the room or something special for them that's going to be a surprise, then he'll tell them that he has a surprise for them. And he'll make comments like oh you must be bored if you're doing that... They're very subtle comments but they're constant. Daily really. And everything, everything is always my fault. It's terrible and he's not even here!! If i don't answer the phone then he'll either call every 15 minutes or else he'll stop by unexpectedly with a coffee. Very intrusive. Even neighbours have come over because he's asked them to stop by and "see how I'm doing". Heaven forbid if someone comes to visit!! I even get intrigated when people park their cars across the street from my house. the neighbours are just being polite saying oh there's this type of car parked outside of the house, she must have company. But if he doesn't recognize the car then the phone starts ringing and the comments come flying. He even questions things I sort through and give to the goodwill. It's a nightmare really. But at least he's no longer living in the house anymore so the physical violence, and intimidation is gone.AnswerMy self confidence and sense of self is began to diminish in December of 2004. Now I have only a vague idea of what I think I have become. I�ve all but given up my identity and in some way made myself an extension of his personality. I realize from my past that I�ve always had weak ego boundaries and domineering personalities allow me to be more submissive, less confrontational and unwilling to make waves in the interests of �getting along."I have a 2 year old daughter and she continues to witness her father constantly calling me names like that are denigrating, or having reference to filth. I'm sometimes sworn at in an appareant attempt to 'get my attention' As if I weren't listening in the first place. The outbursts were never this strong and not as frequent. We used to have fun together, now we just pass each other in the house, with me hoping I don't provoke him into another rage or another intense lecture. I'm always given instruction or directions when he leaves the house, as if I wouldn't know what to do with my time if he weren't around. It's hard to really put a finger on the abuse itself because it usually happens in a lot of different scenarios at a lot of different times. Most times, he makes it seem as though if I hadn't provoked him, he wouldn't have yelled or lost his cool or what ever. I guess, if I had to compare it to anything, it's a little like living with a slightly senile person who remembers some things, but not others. He finds you comical to torment and even if you tell him his behavior hurts you, he says things like, "I don't know what you mean." "Exactly when did I do anything that hurt you". If you come up with specific examples, they say, "I don't remember that." Then you sit there like a fool trying to find an incident he does remember and then he says you're just overreacting to an incident and pushes it off on your interpretation of it. And they honestly, honestly don't remember the incident the way that you do and if you ask them, they will tell you a completely different story in order to distract you from your true intent which is to engage them in dialogue. It is really hopeless.I've told him several times that if he is not happy with me, he may leave at anytime. The house and the business I started are in my name alone. He owns the car. I hide within myself when he's around and I don't like to sleep with him. We don't have sex anymore. I can't stand it.AnswerI thought it was me. I thought I was being ungrateful and picky. I made excuses for his behaviour, "because he came from so far away to see me (us) and he was working so hard to save up the time to come and visit". I began a long distance romance with a firefighter in California. It was the biggest mistake I have ever made in my life. Slowly, my sense of self-worth was eroded by this needy, manipulative, narcissistic man. Obviously, I was a sitting duck. Separated and trying to raise two boys. He just slipped in under my radar. Arguments were pointless because he had a special way of making me feel like I was the crazy one. When I refused outright to allow him to help with my mortgage, his use of the words stubborn and ungrateful were like he was swearing at me. When I refused his offer of a new microwave, he went down to the breaker box and disconnected the connection (unbeknownst to me). When my old, faithful microwave suddenly stopped working, there he was with a new one. When I put a downpayment on a new door for my entranceway, he secretly went back to the store and paid it all off. This is typical behaviour for a man in the early stages of abuse - he wants to make himself indispensible. When he expressed an interest in disciplining the boys, I told him if he had issues with the boys, to discuss them directly with them, but that I was going to handle discipline. He then went on a rant about how the job of a step-parent was thankless and that I was not supporting him in his hopes of being a good father figure. We were not married/living together and I didn't consider him as anything more than "the boyfriend". He wanted to adopt the boys and when I pointed out that their father would never give up his parental rights (and had no reason to), once again, I was not being supportive. He would shame my sons into tears and be proud of it. He raped me anally when I was pregnant with our daughter and then told me I had imagined it. How do you imagine anal violation? When I wanted my daughter to have a hyphenated last name, he ranted and raved about hauling me into court and taking her away from me (she was 10 days old). He shared my innermost thoughts and feelings about my family with my brother and sister-in-law and denied that he had. He told my neighbours he couldn't refuse my request to have a baby (that I trapped him into it). He told friends that I expected him to quit his job in California and move to Canada. At that point, I was grateful for the time away from him...why would I want him to come here fulltime? When I wanted to return to school after the baby, he offered to help financially, but somehow, the money just couldn't make it from California to Ontario. Mysterious. He claimed he didn't have a checking account. Enter the financial control. Yuck. When I think about the things he did to me sexually, the hurt he caused, the humiliation. He used to tell me, "You need this". I haven't been with a man since I kicked him out 3 years ago. Don't want sex. I want to heal mentally and physically.He had to go. He started to tell me that no one else would want me. That who else would come from so far away? I started not to care. He still watches my house. I am sure he is responsible for at least 90% of the hangup phonecalls we get. He comes to visit my daughter and uses her as an excuse to shadow me. My lawyer just doesn't get it. I guess this form of abuse is just too subtle for his brain.This story is just a short version of the months of crazy-making behaviour I have experienced at the hands of this nut. We are still trying to wash off the "dirt" he brought into our home. Please, please listen to your instincts. If you find yourself making excuses for someone's bad behaviour, stop. It is NEVER EVER your fault. Does he scowl at you to make you behave in a certain way? Give you the silent treatment? Does he insist on taking you to appointments and picking you up? This guy was insulted when my therapist didn't want to talk to him. Like he had the inside track on my thinking...Does he show up even when you tell him you will make your own way home? You cannot change him. If he promises he will when you threaten to leave, just leave. He will not change. Above all, don't get sucked back into his game. He will just make you crazy all over again. Women deserve so much better than this. Be strong. Stand up for yourself. Believe in yourself. There are good, helpful people out there. Women's Shelters and Sexual Assault Centres are good places for support. Calling a Crisis Line can get you in contact with other sources. I found this website interesting - although some of the messages are not very helpful.AnswerI need to share here because I have been told to look into this matter because of my past actions. I can say, that I am shocked that i have done some of these things. More so, I am ashamed that I did this to someone close to me that I love. I am not asking or looking for pity, in fact, i will probably incur wrath from some. And that is totally acceptible, because i have no one to blame other than myself. I can not blame my past, my lost girlfriend, or any other factors. I am held accountable for my actions and I accept that. Seeing first hand what the results are of hurting someone I love is devastating. The fcat that I can not take back my actions makes it even worse, but I have to accept the consequences of my actions and the only course of action left to me is to recognize my faults and correct them for the good of all, even if that means losing the one I love forever. Never were my intentions malicious, yes, I have said things that should NEVER be said to a woman and i regret those words and will for as long as i am alive. The damage i did makes me feel ashamed of myself. This is in no way a narcissistic view of myself, if it was I wuld be saying that "she deserved it" and free myself of the guilt. Instead, I am admitting my faults and owning up to them. i screwed up, plain and simple, no excuse. I am hoping I never caused her to feel scared of me in a violent way, the last thing i could ever do is hurt her physically. Striking a lady goes against my principles. I do know that i have never lied to her, and although she has left, she can say without a doubt that I did not ever lie to her. Because of a past incident in her life, i harped on her and made her feel bad about herself. Looking back now, i was wrong in every sense. It was not my business nor my right to question her, what was in the past should have stayed there and her actions do not define who she really is, a lady. I caused her to doubt herself and lose the self esteem she has earned. I caused her emotional pain that i could not fathom other than what i am going through and even then, it is in no way comparable. I deserve what i am feeling, and the sole person to blame is myself and my stupid behavior. She is by far a better person than I will ever be and I hope that she knows that. Now with all that said, i want to address the 5 categories I read above:1. Inducing disorientation: I am still in the process of going over all the things that may have caused this in her. Although i supported her in all her endeavors, i failed to tell her. I told my friends how great she was in handling dilemmas, but it should have been her i told. I did make her doubt her decision from the past but I did not use lying as a tool. I used my black/white perception (which is changing). I did encourage her to pursue her dreams in her sport and life. But I did not do it consistently.2.Incapacitating: I do not believe i did this, although she is the one who can answer this best. I would help her if she needed help, but I did not see her as a hapless person who needed me to do everything for her. Although i did try to offer advice on certain situations and how to handle them in order to make things easier for her (she works hard and I was attempting to alleviate some of the burdens).3.Shared Psychosis (Follies-a-Deux): I live in the real world so i do not see this as a factor. I did not perceive "imaginary enemies" other than those I have actually encountered in real-world situations, which she was no where near. The ones I faced were real and if any of you have been in the "Sand Box" you will understand. I did test her integrity and loyalty, which i hold as a creed. I showed her complete loyalty and integrity, i would never violate that and would expect the same. I do not believe in flirting, cheating, or any other way that would make her doubt she was the one I loved.4.Abuse of Information: I was allowed access to her email and phone records and I did look at it. Just as i offered her access to mine so she could have peace of mind if she wanted it. I abused that and now see it as an invasion of privacy that I should not have done.5.Control by Proxy: The only times I have "recruited" anyone was to talk to her. She is angry with me and if she could hear from others I believed that she would listen to a third party. I did not prod, cajole, or script anything. My friends are just that, friends, and they saw how devastated I am and asked if they could do anything. All I asked is if they had anything to say, to just call her and talk. But I do not dump them.There is no doubt i did some wrong things, probably a lot in her view (which is what counts the most). But the fact now is she is devastated and I am to blame for that. With her bringing this up to me, I am able to look at the harm I caused. I am hoping that it is not too late, because now that it is out in the open, I can see it and do something about it. Whatever changes i need to make are not impossible now that they are in full view in my eyes. They are changes i will make in order to make right what I have done wrong. I know deep inside that these are things that are not impossible but rather "common sense". Her fear is that i will revert back to the same thing, but the real truth is I am going to revert back to the original person she first met and fell in love with. I can remember her smile and laughter and beaming love and that is what i wish more than anything to see again. Her trust in me is not going to happen right away, and i understand that and accept that and the only thing that is left to do is show her these changes and keep showing her over and over. Maybe one day she will accept me and believe in me again. Now that i have been shown the outcome of my actions, it is my responsibility and duty to her to show her how much she means to me and never fail her again. And i would expect of her to not take any "crap" from me and tell me so.This is a topic I so desperately need to do research on to build a battered woman's case in a law-suit with my battering ex-husband's sister (she is his defender and enabler and traitor to battered women. . Her brother once beat someone up with a baseball bat the guy was in intensive care, but Valerie has stated in legal documents she is "proud to be an enabler" (and supposedly the defender of family honor...the one who makes more money that all of us and can therefore "save" us all". Anyhow, I barely have time for all the research but I would love to hear from any and or all of you on my message board. There is so much perception here of the subtle treachery. Anyhow, I really want to mention that long ago I wondered how to detect an abuser (after I came out of an abusive childhood wwith a cruel mother who tried to kill me in a car accident over a lollipop I asked for) and many years later I could spot an abuser plain as day in borad daylight. One of thee most prevalent characteristics of these men is that at FIRST they make the most obvious public displays of their interest (how inappropriate...intimacy is private, not public). They try to occupy the heights of public life while they attempt to conquer you. You'd almost cower in the grocery store in submission if you didn't realize how despicable this type of "courtship" is. They do it in public at first because the odds are you are not going to publicly embarrass him or yourself. Public domination is almost a guarantee you'll "be nice". So I've had to defend myself in public plenty and not feel the slightest bit guilty over the fact that I've saved myself from this type of public exploitation where I have no choice except to be "nice". You're out there trying to work and take care of personal needs...you're not out there to "socialize" or make friends. You already have plenty of friends, you socialize plenty, your time is your time whenever you choose it. The fact that you are walking in broad daylight does not mean you are an open door they can walk through. One more thing....lets not confuse when "nice guys" are just nice just to be nice. Not everyone who is nice means he wants to jump into bed. And that works both ways. I've had plenty of guys think I meant more than I did just because I meant to be polite and "nice."AnswerI should certainly hope that not all solicitation of third party consultation or even of intervention outright automatically constitutes abuse by howsoever unwitting proxy! I'd even hope that all public attention of any sort whatsoever does not automatically constitute manipulation by deliberately creating awkward tension and invading privacy. I certainly hope that there can be allowance for interest and support. Otherwise, I might need to invest in a portable cone of silence! The concept of stealth abuse is not of simple misunderstanding but of something intentional and devious.


Why do humans give birth?

Childbirth (also called labour, birth, partus or parturition) is the culmination of a human pregnancy or gestation period with birth of one or more newborn infants from a woman's uterus. The process of normal human childbirth is categorized in three stages of labour: the shortening and dilation of the cervix, descent and birth of the infant, and birth of the placenta.[1]. In some cases, childbirth is achieved through caesarean section, the removal of the neonate through a surgical incision in the abdomen, rather than through vaginal birth.Contents[hide]1 The mechanics of vaginal birth2 The stages of normal human birth 2.1 Latent phase2.2 First stage: dilation2.3 Second stage: expulsion2.4 Third stage: placenta3 After the birth4 Pain 4.1 Descriptions4.2 Non-medical pain control4.3 Medical pain control5 Complications of birth 5.1 Labor complications5.2 Maternal complications5.3 Fetal complications 5.3.1 Mechanical fetal injury5.3.2 Neonatal infection5.3.3 Neonatal death5.3.4 Intrapartum asphyxia6 Instrumental delivery (Forceps and Ventouse)7 Twins and multiple births8 Variations 8.1 Being born in the caul9 Professions associated with childbirth10 Social and legal aspects11 Psychological aspects12 Partner and other support13 See also14 References15 External links[edit] The mechanics of vaginal birthBecause humans are bipedal with an erect stance and have, in relation to the size of the pelvis, the biggest head and shoulders of any species, human fetuses are adapted to make birth possible.The erect posture causes the weight of the abdominal contents to thrust on the pelvic floor, a complex structure which must not only support this weight but allow three channels to pass through it: the urethra, the vagina and the rectum. The relatively large head and shoulders require a specific sequence of manoeuvres to occur for the bony head and shoulders to pass through the bony ring of the pelvis. If these manoeuvres fail, the progress of labour is arrested. All changes in the soft tissues of the cervix and the birth canal are entirely dependent on the successful completion of these six maneuvers:Engagement of the fetal head in the transverse position. The baby is looking across the pelvis at one or other of the mother's hips.Descent and flexion of the fetal headInternal rotation. The fetal head rotates 90 degrees to the occipito-anterior position so that the baby's face is towards the mother's rectum.Delivery by extension. The fetal head passes out of the birth canal. Its head is tilted backwards so that its forehead leads the way through the vagina.Restitution. The fetal head turns through 45 degrees to restore its normal relationship with the shoulders, which are still at an angle.External rotation. The shoulders repeat the corkscrew movements of the head, which can be seen in the final movements of the fetal head.[edit] The stages of normal human birth[edit] Latent phaseThe latent phase of labor may last many days and the contractions are an intensification of the Braxton Hicks contractions that may start around 26 weeks gestation. Cervical effacement occurs during the closing weeks of pregnancy and is usually complete or near complete, by the end of latent phase. Cervical effacement or Cervical dilation is the thinning and stretching of the cervix. The degree of cervical effacement may be felt during a vaginal examination. A 'long' cervix implies that not much has been taken into the lower segment, and vice versa for a 'short' cervix. Latent phase ends with the onset of active first stage; when the cervix is about 3 cm dilated.[edit] First stage: dilationThe first stage of labor starts classically when the effaced (thinned) cervix is 3 cm dilated. There is variation in this point as some women may have active contractions prior to reaching this point, or they may reach this point without regular contractions. The onset of actual labor is defined when the cervix begins to progressively dilate. Rupture of the membranes, or a blood stained 'show' may or may not occur at or around this stage.Uterine muscles form opposing spirals from the top of the upper segment of the uterus to its junction with the lower segment. During effacement, the cervix becomes incorporated into the lower segment of the uterus. During a contraction, these muscles contract causing shortening of the upper segment and drawing upwards of the lower segment, in a gradual expulsive motion. This draws the cervix up over the baby's head. Full dilatation is reached when the cervix is the size of the baby's head; at around 10 cm dilation for a term baby.The duration of labour varies widely, but active phase averages some 8 hours for women giving birth to their first child ("primiparae") and 4 hours for women who have already given birth ("multiparae"). Active phase arrest in a primigravid woman is the failure of the cervix to dilate at a rate of 1.2cm/hr over a period of at least two hours. This is based soley upon Friedman's Curve, the gold standard for rates of cervical dilation and fetal descent during active labor, developed almost 50 years ago. The authors conclude that the Friedman curve likely represents an ideal, rather than an average, curve. Although this study has limitations (e.g., assessment of cervical dilation is somewhat subjective), practitioners who base their diagnoses of protraction and arrest solely on the Friedman curve might need to reconsider their approach to labor assessment. Women who do not progress at this rate should not be considered 'abnormal,' only average. "Failure to Progress," is what can also be known simply as "Failure to wait," on the part of the practitioner, and should by no means be a red flag to perform a Cesarean - major abdominal surgery.[2][edit] Second stage: expulsionThis stage begins when the cervix is fully dilated, and ends when the baby is finally birthed. At the beginning of the normal second stage, the head is fully engaged in the pelvis; the widest diameter of the head has successfully passed through the pelvic brim. Ideally it has successfully also passed below the interspinous diameter. This is the narrowest part of the pelvis. If these have been accomplished, all that will remain is for the fetal head to pass below the pubic arch and out through the introitus. This is assisted by the additional maternal efforts of "bearing down". The fetal head is seen to 'crown' as the labia part. At this point the woman may feel a burning or stinging sensation.Birth of the fetal head signals the successful completion of the fourth mechanism of labour (delivery by extension), and is followed by the fifth and sixth mechanisms (restitution and external rotation).A newborn baby with umbilical cord ready to be clampedThe second stage of labour will vary to some extent, depending on how successfully the preceding tasks have been accomplished.[edit] Third stage: placentaIn this stage, the uterus expels the placenta (afterbirth). The placenta is usually birthed within 15-30 minutes of the baby being born. Maternal blood loss is limited by contraction of the uterus following birth of the placenta. Normal blood loss is less than 600 mL.Breastfeeding during and after the third stage, the placenta is visible in the bowl to the right.The third stage can be managed either expectantly or actively. Expectant management (also known as physiological management) allows the placenta to be expelled without medical assistance. Breastfeeding soon after birth and massaging of the top of the uterus (the fundus) causes uterine contractions that encourage birth of the placenta. Active management utilizes oxytocic agents and controlled cord traction. The oxytocic agents augment uterine muscular contraction and the cord traction assists with rapid birth of the placenta.A Cochrane database study[3] suggests that blood loss and the risk of postpartum bleeding will be reduced in women offered active management of the third stage of labour. However, the use of ergometrine for active management was associated with nausea or vomiting and hypertension, and controlled cord traction requires the immediate clamping of the umbilical cord.[edit] After the birthMany cultures feature initiation rites for newborns, such as naming ceremonies, baptism, and others.Mothers are often allowed a period where they are relieved of their normal duties to recover from childbirth. The length of this period varies. In many countries, taking time off from work to care for a newborn is called "maternity leave" or "parental leave" and can vary from a few days to several months.[edit] PainPain levels reported by labouring women vary widely. Pain levels seem to be influenced by fear and anxiety levels, experience with prior childbirth, cultural ideas of childbirth and pain[4][5], mobility during labour and the support given during labour. One study found that middle-eastern women, especially those with a low educational background, had more painful experiences during childbirth.[6]Pain is only one factor of many influencing women's experience with the process of childbirth. A systematic review of 137 studies found that personal expectations, the amount of support from caregivers, quality of the caregiver-patient relationship, and involvement in decisionmaking are more important in women's overall satisfaction with the experience of childbirth than are other factors such as age, socioeconomic status, ethnicity, preparation, physical environment, pain, immobility, or medical interventions.[7][edit] DescriptionsPain in contractions has been described as feeling like a very strong menstrual cramp. Midwives often encourage refraining from screaming but recommend moaning and grunting to relieve some pain. Crowning will feel like intense stretching and burning. Even women who show little reaction to labor pains often show a reaction to crowning.[edit] Non-medical pain controlSome women prefer to avoid analgesic medication during childbirth. They still can try to alleviate labor pain using psychological preparation, education, massage, hypnosis, or water therapy in a tub or shower. Some women like to have someone to support them during labor and birth, such as the father of the baby, the woman's mother, a sister, a close friend, a partner or a doula. Some women deliver in a squatting or crawling position in order to more effectively push during the second stage and so that gravity can aid the descent of the baby through the birth canal.The human body also has a chemical response to pain, by releasing endorphins. Endorphins are present before, during, and immediately after childbirth.[8] Some homebirth advocates believe that this hormone can induce feelings of pleasure and euphoria during childbirth,[9] reducing the risk of maternal depression some weeks later.[8]Water birth is an option chosen by some women for pain relief during labor and childbirth, and some studies have shown waterbirth in an uncomplicated pregnancy to reduce the need for analgesia, without evidence of increased risk to mother or newborn.[10] Hot water tubs are available in many hospitals and birthing centres.Meditation and mind medicine techniques are also used for pain control during labour and delivery. These techniques are used in conjunction with progressive muscle relaxation and many other forms of relaxation for the mind and body to aid in pain control for women during childbirth. One such technique is the use of hypnosis in childbirth.A new mode of analgesia is sterile water injection placed just underneath the skin in the most painful spots during labor. A control trial in Iran of 0.5mL injections was conducted with normal saline which revealed a statistical superiority with water over saline. [11][edit] Medical pain controlDifferent measures for pain control have varying degrees of success and side effects to the woman and her baby. In some countries of Europe, doctors commonly prescribe inhaled nitrous oxide gas for pain control, especially as 50% nitrous oxide, 50% oxygen, known as Entonox; in the UK, midwives may use this gas without a doctor's prescription. Pethidine (with or without promethazine) may be used early in labour, as well as other opioids such as fentanyl, but if given too close to birth there is a risk of respiratory depression in the infant.Popular medical pain control in hospitals include the regional anesthetics epidural blocks, and spinal anaesthesia. Epidural analgesia is a generally safe and effective method of relieving pain in labour, but is associated with longer labour, more operative intervention (particularly instrument delivery), and increases in cost.[12] One study found that the women receiving epidural analgesia had more fear before the administering of the epidural than those who did not receive it, but that they did not necessarily have more pain.[13] Medicine administered via epidural can cross the placenta and enter the bloodstream of the fetus.[14] Epidural analgesia has no statistically significant impact on the risk of caesarean section, and does not appear to have an immediate effect on neonatal status as determined by Apgar scores.[15][edit] Complications of birthBirthing complications may be maternal or fetal, and long term or short term.[edit] Labor complicationsThe second stage of labor may be delayed or lengthy due to:malpresentation of the fetal head (breech birth, face-first, or other)failure of descent of the fetal head through the pelvic brim or the interspinous diameterpoor uterine contraction strengthactive phase arresta big baby and a small pelvisshoulder dystociaSecondary changes may be observed: swelling of the tissues, maternal exhaustion, fetal heart rate abnormalities. Left untreated, severe complications include death of mother and/or baby, and genitovaginal fistula. These are commonly seen in Third World countries where births are often unattended or attended by poorly trained community members.[edit] Maternal complicationsVaginal birth injury with visible tears or episiotomies are common. Internal tissue tearing as well as nerve damage to the pelvic structures lead in a proportion of women to problems with prolapse, incontinence of stool or urine and sexual dysfunction. Fifteen percent of women become incontinent, to some degree, of stool or urine after normal delivery, this number rising considerably after these women reach menopause. Vaginal birth injury is a necessary, but not sufficient, cause of all non hysterectomy related prolapse in later life. Risk factors for significant vaginal birth injury include:a baby weighing more than 4 kilos (9 pounds)the use of forceps or vacuum for delivery. These markers are more likely to be signals for other abnormalities as forceps or vacuum are not used in normal deliveries.the need to repair large tears after deliveryPelvic girdle pain. Hormones and enzymes work together to produce ligamentous relaxation and widening of the symphysis pubis during the last trimester of pregnancy. Most girdle pain occurs before birthing, and is known as diastasis of the pubic symphysis. Predisposing factors for girdle pain include maternal obesity.Infection remains a major cause of mortality and morbidity in the developing world today. The work of Ignaz Semmelweis was seminal in the pathophysiology and treatment of puerperal fever and saved many lives.Hemorrhage, or heavy blood loss, is still the leading cause of death of birthing mothers in the world today, especially in the developing world. Heavy blood loss leads to hypovolemic shock, insufficient perfusion of vital organs and death if not rapidly treated. Blood transfusion may be life saving. Rare sequelae include Hypopituitarism Sheehan's syndrome. The maternal mortality (MMR) rate varies from 9/100,000 live births in the US and Europe, to 900/100,000 live births in Sub-Saharan Africa. [8][edit] Fetal complications[edit] Mechanical fetal injuryRisk factors for fetal birth injury include fetal macrosomia (big baby), maternal obesity, the need for instrumental delivery, and an inexperienced attendant. Specific situations that can contribute to birth injury include breech presentation and shoulder dystocia. Most fetal birth injuries resolve without long term harm, but brachial plexus injury may lead to Erb's palsy.[edit] Neonatal infectionNeonates are prone to infection in the first month of life. Some organisms such as S. agalactiae (Group B Streptococcus) or (GBS) are more prone to cause these occasionally fatal infections. Risk factors for GBS infection include:prematurity (birth prior to 37 weeks gestation)a sibling who has had a GBS infectionprolonged labour or rupture of membranesUntreated sexually transmitted infections are associated with congenital and perinatal infections in neonates, particularly in the areas where rates of infection remain high. The overall perinatal mortality rate associated with untreated syphilis, for example, approached 40%.[16][edit] Neonatal deathInfant deaths (neonatal deaths from birth to 28 days, or perinatal deaths if including fetal deaths at 28 weeks gestation and later) are around 1% in modernized countries. The "natural" mortality rate of childbirth-where nothing is done to avert maternal death-has been estimated as being between 1,000 and 1,500 deaths per 100,000 births.[17] (See main article: neonatal death, maternal death)The most important factors affecting mortality in childbirth are adequate nutrition and access to quality medical care ("access" is affected both by the cost of available care, and distance from health services). "Medical care" in this context does not refer specifically to treatment in hospitals, but simply routine prenatal care and the presence, at the birth, of an attendant with birthing skills.A 1983-1989 study by the Texas Department of Health highlighted the differences in neonatal mortality (NMR) between high risk and low risk pregnancies. NMR was 0.57% for doctor-attended high risk births, and 0.19% for low risk births attended by non-nurse midwives. Conversely, some studies demonstrate a higher perinatal mortality rate with assisted home births.[18] Around 80% of pregnancies are low-risk. Factors that may make a birth high risk include prematurity, high blood pressure, gestational diabetes and a previous cesarean section.[edit] Intrapartum asphyxiaIntrapartum asphyxia is the impairment of the delivery of oxygen to the brain and vital tissues during the progress of labour. This may exist in a pregnancy already impaired by maternal or fetal disease, or may rarely arise de novo in labour. This can be termed fetal distress, but this term may be emotive and misleading. True intrapartum asphyxia is not as common as previously believed, and is usually accompanied by multiple other symptoms during the immediate period after delivery. Monitoring might show up problems during birthing, but the interpretation and use of monitoring devices is complex and prone to misinterpretation. Intrapartum asphyxia can cause long-term impairment, particularly when this results in tissue damage through encephalopathy.[19][edit] Instrumental delivery (Forceps and Ventouse)The woman will have her legs supported in stirrups.If an anaesthetic is not already in place it will be given.Episiotomy might be needed.A Trial Forceps might be performed, which is abandoned in favor of a caesarean section if delivery is not optimal.[edit] Twins and multiple birthsTwins can be delivered vaginally. In some cases twin delivery is done in a larger delivery room or in theatre, just in case complications occur e.g.Both twins born vaginally - one comes normally but the other is breech and/or helped by a forceps/ventouse deliveryOne twin born vaginally and the other by caesarean section.If the twins are joined at any part of the body - called conjoined twins, delivery is mostly by caesarean section.[edit] Variations[edit] Being born in the caulWhen the amniotic sac has not ruptured during labour or pushing, the infant can be born with the membranes intact. This is referred to as "being born in the caul." The caul is harmless and its membranes are easily broken and wiped away. In medieval times, and in some cultures still today, a caul was seen as a sign of good fortune for the baby, even giving the child psychic gifts such as clairvoyance, and in some cultures was seen as protection against drowning. The caul was often impressed onto paper and stored away as an heirloom for the child. With the advent of modern interventive obstetrics, premature artificial rupture of the membranes has become common, so babies are rarely born in the caul.[edit] Professions associated with childbirthModel of pelvis used in the beginning of the 20th century to teach technical procedures for a successful childbirth. Museum of the History of Medicine, Porto Alegre, BrazilDoulas are assistants who support mothers during pregnancy, labour, birth, and postpartum. They are not medical attendants; rather, they provide emotional support and non-medical pain relief for women during labour.Midwives provide care to low-risk pregnant mothers. Midwives may be licensed and registered, or may be lay practitioners. Jurisdictions with legislated midwives will typically have a registering and disciplinary body, such as a College of Midwifery. Registered midwives are trained to assist a mother with labour and birth, either through direct-entry or nurse-midwifery programs. Lay midwives, who are usually not licensed or registered, typically gain experience through apprenticeship with other lay midwives.Medical doctors who practice obstetrics include categorically specialized obstetricians; family practitioners and general practitioners whose training, skills and practices include obstetrics; and in some contexts general surgeons. These physicians and surgeons variously provide care across the whole spectrum of normal and abnormal births and pathological labour conditions. Categorically specialized obstetricians are qualified surgeons, so they can undertake surgical procedures relating to childbirth. Some family practitioners or general practitioners are also privileged to perform obstetrical surgery. Obstetrical procedures include cesarean sections, episiotomies, and assisted delivery. Categorical specialists in obstetrics are commonly dually trained in obstetrics and gynecology (OB/GYN), and may provide other medical and surgical gynecological care, and may incorporate more general, well-woman, primary care elements in their practices. Maternal-fetal medicine specialists are obstetrician/gynecologists subspecialized in managing and treating high-risk pregnancy and delivery.Obstetric nurses assist midwives, doctors, women, and babies prior to, during, and after the birth process, in the hospital system. Some midwives are also obstetric nurses. Obstetric nurses hold various certifications and typically undergo additional obstetric training in addition to standard nursing training.[edit] Social and legal aspectsIn most cultures, a person's age is now defined relative to their date of birth. Historically, in Europe age was once counted from baptism.Some families view the placenta as a special part of birth, since it has been the child's life support for so many months. Some parents like to see and touch this organ. In some cultures, parents plant a tree along with the placenta on the child's first birthday. The placenta may be eaten by the newborn's family, ceremonially or otherwise (for nutrition; the great majority of animals in fact do this naturally).[20]The exact location in which childbirth takes place is an important factor in determining nationality, in particular for birth aboard aircraft and ships.[edit] Psychological aspectsChildbirth can be an intense event and strong emotions, both positive and negative, can be brought to the surface.While many women experience joy, relief, and elation upon the birth of their child, some women report symptoms compatible with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) after birth. Between 70 and 80% of mothers in the United States report some feelings of sadness or "baby blues" after childbirth. Postpartum depression may develop in some women; about 10% of mothers in the United States are diagnosed with this condition. Abnormal and persistent fear of childbirth is known as tokophobia.Preventive group therapy has proven effective as a prophylactic treatment for postpartum depression.[21]Childbirth is stressful for the infant. In addition to the normal stress of leaving the protected uterine environment, additional stresses associated with breech birth, such as asphyxiation, may affect the infant's brain.[edit] Partner and other supportMain article: Men's role in childbirthThere is increasing evidence to show that the participation of the woman's partner in the birth leads to better birth and also post-birth outcomes, providing the partner does not exhibit excessive anxiety.[22] Research also shows that when a labouring woman was supported by a female helper such as a family member or doula during labour, she had less need for chemical pain relief, the likelihood of caesarean section was reduced, use of forceps and other instrumental deliveries were reduced and there was a reduction in the length of labour and the baby had a higher Apgar score (Dellman 2004, Vernon 2006).It has been found that fathers can have different roles during birth and that little is said about the conflicts between partners or partners and professionals. Among other findings were also: the interpretation of the presence of fathers during birth as a modern version of the anthropological couvade ritual to ease the woman's pain; the majority of fathers did not perceive any limitation to participate in their childbirth and upper generations did not play an important rule in the transmission of knowledge about birth to those fathers but the wives, feminine acquaintances and midwives.[citation needed]The research was based, mainly, on in-depth interviews, where fathers described what was happening from their partner's first signals of birth labour until the placenta delivery.[citation needed][edit] See alsoWikinews has related news: 17-pound baby born in Russia Wikimedia Commons has media related to: ChildbirthAdvanced maternal agePre- and perinatal psychologyPostnatalLamazeNatalismHomebirthUnassisted childbirthWaterbirthPre-laborAsynclitic birth, an abnormal birth positionVernix caseosa[edit] References^ The Columbia Encyclopedia, Sixth Edition. Copyright 2006 Columbia University Press^ Peisner DB, Rosen MG: Transition from latent to active labor. Obstet Gynecol 68:448, 1986.^ Prendiville WJ, Elbourne D, McDonald S. (2000). "Active versus expectant management in the third stage of labour.". Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews, Issue 3. Art. No.: CD000007. DOI: 10.1002/14651858.CD000007. doi:10.1002/14651858.CD000007.^ [1] S.E. Weber, "Cultural Aspects of Pain in Childbearing Women", Journal of Obstetric, Gynecologic, & Neonatal Nursing, Vol. 25, No. 1, pp. 67-72 (Jul 2006)^ [2] L. Callister, "The pain of childbirth: perceptions of culturally diverse women . ", Pain Management Nursing , Vol. 4, No. 4, pp. 145-154 (2003)^ [3] M. Weisenberg, Z. Caspi, "Cultural and educational influences on pain of childbirth.", Journal of Pain Symptom Management, Vol. 4, No. 1, pp. 13-19, (Mar. 1989)^ [4] Ellen D. Hodnett, "Pain and women's satisfaction with the experience of childbirth: A systematic review. ", American Journal of Obstetrics & Gynecology, Vol. 186, No. 5, Supplement: pp. S160-S172. (May 2002)^ a b Brinsmead M; Smith R, Singh B, Lewin T, Owens P (August 1985). "Peripartum concentrations of beta endorphin and cortisol and maternal mood states". Aust N Z J Obstet Gynaecol 25 (3): 194-7. doi:10.1111/j.1479-828X.1985.tb00642.x. PMID 2935137.^ Giving Birth: The Endocrinology of Ecstacy",[5]^ Eberhard J, Stein S, Geissbuehler V (2005). "Experience of pain and analgesia with water and land births". Journal of psychosomatic obstetrics and gynecology 26(2): 127-33. PMID 16050538.^ Shohreh BAHASADR. Australian and New Zealand Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology Volume 46 2006 Issue 2, Pages 102 - 106.^ Thorp JA, Breedlove G (1996). "Epidural analgesia in labour: an evaluation of risks and benefits". Birth (Berkeley, Calif.) 23 (2): 63-83. PMID 8826170. "Epidural analgesia is a safe and effective method of relieving pain in labour, but is associated with longer labour, more operative intervention, and increases in cost. It must remain an option; however, caregivers and consumers should be aware of associated risks. Women should be counseled about these risks and other pain-relieving options before the duress of labour.".^ [6] Siw Alehagen, Barbro Wijma, Ulf Lundberg, Klaas Wijma, "Fear, pain and stress hormones during childbirth", Journal of Psychosomatic Obstetrics & Gynecology, Vol. 26, No. 3, pp. 153-165, (Sep. 2005)^ [7] Loftus, John R; Hill, Harlan; Cohen, Sheila E. "Placental Transfer and Neonatal Effects of Epidural Sufentanil and Fentanyl Administered with Bupivacaine during Labour" Anesthesiology, Vol. 83, No. 2, pp 300-308 (August 1995)^ Anim-Somuah M (October 19, 2005). "Epidural versus non-epidural or no analgesia in labour.". Cochrane Database Syst Rev. 4. doi:10.1002/14651858.CD000331.pub2. PMID 16235275.^ "Sexually transmitted infections: Infections and Transmission". World Health Organization. http://www.who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs110/en/.^ Van Lerberghe W, De Brouwere V. Of blind alleys and things that have worked: history's lessons on reducing maternal mortality. In: De Brouwere V, Van Lerberghe W, eds. Safe motherhood strategies: a review of the evidence. Antwerp, ITG Press, 2001 (Studies in Health Services Organisation and Policy, 17:7-33).^ "Perinatal death associated with planned home birth in Australia: population based study". BMJ. 317(7155):384-8. http://bmj.bmjjournals.com/cgi/content/short/317/7155/384. Retrieved on May 28 2005.^ van Handel M, Swaab H, de Vries LS, Jongmans MJ (July 2007). "Long-term cognitive and behavioral consequences of neonatal encephalopathy following perinatal asphyxia: a review". Eur. J. Pediatr. 166 (7): 645-54. doi:10.1007/s00431-007-0437-8. PMID 17426984. PMC: 1914268. http://www.pubmedcentral.nih.gov/articlerender.fcgi?tool=pubmed&pubmedid=17426984.^ Having a Great Birth in Australia, David Vernon, Australian College of Midwives, 2005 p56^ Zlotnick C, Johnson SL, Miller IW, Pearlstein T, Howard M. Postpartum depression in women receiving public assistance: pilot study of an interpersonal-therapy-oriented group intervention, Am J Psychiatry. 2001 Apr;158(4):638-40. [PMID 11282702]^ Men at Birth - Should your bloke be there?[edit] External links3D Medical Animation of Normal Child Birth at YouTube[show] v • d • eFamily planning and Reproductive healthRights Reproductive rights (Contraceptive security · Genital integrity)Education Sex education · Pre-conception counseling · Genetic counselingPlanning Childfree · Parenting (Childbirth, Adoption, Foster care)Implement Birth control · Safe sexHealth Men's · Women's (Vulvovaginal)Pregnancy Maternal health · Obstetrics · Prenatal care · Pregnant patients' rights · Unintended pregnancy · Pregnancy options counseling · Abortion · Teenage pregnancyMedicine Andrology · Gynaecology · Obstetrics and gynaecology · Reproductive endocrinology and infertility · Genitourinary medicineDisorder Sexual dysfunction · Infertility (Assisted reproductive technology) · Reproductive system disease · Sexually transmitted disease (clinic, test)See also Templates: {{Birth control methods}} ·{{Pregnancy}} · {{Sex}} · {{sexual abuse}} ·{{STD/STI}}[show] v • d • ePregnancy and ChildbirthPlanning Birth control • Pre-conception counselingConception Fertility awareness • Assisted reproductive technology (IVF, AI, Fertility medication)Testing Home testing • Obstetric ultrasonography • Prenatal diagnosis • 3D ultrasoundPrenatal AnatomyEndometrium • Placenta • Amniotic fluid • Amniotic sacDevelopmentGestational age • Human embryogenesisCareNutritionProceduresAmniocentesis • Chorionic villus samplingComplicationsPreterm birth • Ectopic pregnancy • Miscarriage • Molar pregnancy • DiabetesChildbirthPreparationLamaze • Bradley method • Nesting instinctRolesMidwife • Doula • Obstetrician • Men's rolesDeliveryUnassisted childbirth • Home birth • Water birth • Natural childbirth • Contraction • Childbirth positionsPostpartum Childcare • Congenital disordersSee also Templates: {{Pathology of pregnancy}} • {{Reproductive physiology}} • {{Embryology}} • {{Certain conditions originating in the perinatal period}}[show] v • d • ePathology of pregnancy, childbirth and the puerperium (O, 630-676)Pregnancy withabortive outcome Ectopic pregnancy · Hydatidiform mole · MiscarriageOedema, proteinuria andhypertensive disorders Gestational hypertension (Pre-eclampsia, Eclampsia) · Gestational diabetes · HELLP syndromeOther, predominantlyrelated to pregnancy Hyperemesis gravidarum · Gestational pemphigoid · Intrahepatic cholestasis of pregnancy ·Acute fatty liver of pregnancy · Chorea gravidarumMaternal care related to thefetus and amniotic cavity andpossible delivery problems amniotic fluid(Polyhydramnios, Oligohydramnios) · chorion/amnion(Chorioamnionitis, Premature rupture of membranes, Amniotic band syndrome) · placenta (Placenta praevia, Placental abruption) · Braxton Hicks contractions · Antepartum haemorrhageComplications oflabour and deliveryPremature birth · Postmature birth · Cephalopelvic disproportion · Dystocia (Shoulder dystocia) · Fetal distress · Vasa praevia · Uterine rupture · hemorrhage ·placenta (Placenta accreta) · Umbilical cord prolapse · Amniotic fluid embolismMaternal complicationsin the weeks after childbirthPuerperal fever ·Peripartum cardiomyopathy · Postpartum thyroiditis ·Galactorrhea · Postpartum depressionFetal complications Fetal intervention · Fetal surgeryOther Maternal deathRetrieved from "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Childbirth"ViewsArticleDiscussionEdit this pageHistoryPersonal toolsLog in / create accountNavigationMain pageContentsFeatured contentCurrent eventsRandom articleSearchInteractionAbout WikipediaCommunity portalRecent changesContact WikipediaDonate to WikipediaHelpToolboxWhat links hereRelated changesUpload fileSpecial pagesPrintable versionPermanent linkCite this pageLanguagesBosanskiBrezhonegČeskyDeutschEspañolEsperantoEuskaraفارسیFrançais한국어HrvatskiIdoItalianoעבריתLatviešuLietuviųMagyarमराठीNederlands日本語OccitanPolskiPortuguêsRuna SimiРусскийSlovenčinaSlovenščinaСрпски / SrpskiSuomiSvenskaతెలుగుไทยУкраїнськаייִדיש中文This page was last modified on 11 May 2009, at 19:32 (UTC).All text is available under the terms of the GNU Free Documentation License. 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