Why do people cross dress?

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2011-07-09 22:44:24

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Even psychiatrists have a difficult time with this one. They feel that it starts around puberty, but, some male children will experiment dressing up in say their sister's clothing and race around the house and turn out to be full-fledged heterosexual males in years to come. Psychiatrists don't seem to know when it starts or really why and what I am typing out is basically a guesstimate on why men choose to dress up as women:

Cross-dressing is another term for transvestism, and this and trans-sexuality and the association of both with homosexuality are often confused, even by some practising cross-dressers. A typical transvestite would be a man who appears quite normal at all times when he is not cross-dressing. He is not likely to be homosexual, will prefer women as his sex partners and will most certainly not want to lose his penis. In contrast, a typical male transsexual will not identify in any way with his physically normal male body. He believes that he is a woman and is trapped in the body of a man. To him, his penis is a mistake of nature and he will want to get rid of it.

Some men use cross-dressing for the purpose of sexual excitement. It seems that the majority of transvestites are no more likely to go on to trans-sexuality than a social drinker is to Alcoholism or an occasional cannabis user to injecting hard drugs. Of course everyone has to start somewhere and there is some evidence to suggest that the longer you cross-dress, the further along the continuum may find yourself moving.

After his initial experiences, the transvestite will progress to one of 3 main groups:

He will stay with the type of garments he first used and have a fetish-like attachment to them. His initial preferences will expand and he will slowly move on to other clothes and finally into the wish to be dressed completely as a woman and to pretend for periods of time that he is a woman, but he will not want to go beyond pretending and will wish to retain his male personality. The third group will fringe on trans-sexuality in that they will live and pass as women for extended periods of time. The only real difference between these so-called "secondary" transsexuals and the full transsexual is that, again, like all the less extreme transvestites, they have no wish to actually be women.

WHY DO MEN CROSS-DRESS? One argument is that transvestism of cross-dressing is a way of offering a challenge to society's preconceptions about gender. Some men cross-dress because they are unhappy at being men. Others didn't mind the male state, but also like to put on women's clothes occasionally. Some men cross-dress simply to make a passing social or fashion statement, and some because they have emotional needs that can only be met by the comfort that wearing women's clothes gives them.

For many transvestites, cross-dressing is an intensely sexual activity. Most transvestites have their first cross-dressing experience around puberty or in adolescence. The first experience is likely to be sexually exciting and the young person will carry on with the practice. However, transvestism is not just a sexual variation. There have always been plenty of men who get a sexual thrill from cross-dressing, but the accepted view of most experts in this field now is that these are not the majority. Sex, particularly with other people is not the main reason why most men cross-dress and will masturbate because they, themselves, are the ideal woman, and the man no longer has to fear rejection, criticism or disappointment which might come with attempts of intercourse with a woman.

Cross-dressers usually will do this in secret and enjoy when the wife and kids leave the home. They have their day planned! They will even go so far as to shave off body hair, take a hot, perfumed, bubble bath, and dress in something silky. Many males will masturbate (why not ... they are male, yet feel like they are a female at the same time.) However, many cross-dressers just enjoy the feel of certain materials against their bodies and go no further than to dress as a woman. More and more cross-dressers are "coming out of the closet" and if lucky, their wives will accept the way they are as long as they keep it private and away from friends and family.

Most cross-dressers are private about it and THEY ARE NOT USUALLY GAY.

Hope this helps.


GENE Says: Many people have their different reasons for wanting to cross dress. I personally am heterosexual. I am not a regular all the time cross dresser, but have done it over the years. For me it is an escape.

I was raised in an abusive home. My mother scorned me continually, condemning me and reminding me she hated me and wished she had never had a son. She abandoned me twice. I had no father, he wanted nothing to do with me.

In school I was persecuted constantly day in and day out. I was thin, geeky and frail and an easy target for bullies. In College I was ostracised and left out of the cliques and in- crowd. Many times I reached out to others, Christians, people in need, and was scorned, ridiculed and used. Even one of my own kids turned against me and smugly walked out of the house.

I eventually hated myself utterly and wanted to die. I lived because I was needed. I thought of suicide. A fluke situation caused me me do the cross dressing thing, but then I looked in the mirror years ago and realized I was no longer seeing me. I was gone, and in my place was a woman. That woman went out on the town with a friend as a joke, but she was liked, popular, hit on, pretty and she was everything I was not. I had completely escaped from myself.

I didn't care it it was makup and fabric. I had put myself to death and turned into someone else. I had the body for it, and I pulled it off successfully. I was not the ugly, hated nerd that no one liked, but this pretty lady. It was too nice to be her and leave me behind. It was such a relief.

I always had an eye for pretty things, velvet, dresses, etc, so it just became natural to do that thing.

I am not a constant regular, but I still enjoy putting me out of existence and becoming this other person. She is known to a few who dont know who "she" is, and they treat her well. It has nothing to do with sexuality, nothing to do with being gay, it is a doorway to being free of a person I wish I was not. If I could come back into the world as her and not be me again I would.

There are others like me. I see men who want to be come women, and I dont hate them, I understand them. I have compassion on them. I've heard it from others. I understand anyone who has to escape pain, no matter what they have to do.

I know some people will mock this and say I need help. I say to you you have never walked in my shoes. Judge me if you want, it makes no difference.

MIKE ADDS- Let's face it folks, if a suit and tie are the best you can do for dress clothes, if jeans and a tee shirt are your casual clothes, and the alernatie is frilly lace and pretty dresses, you can kinda see the point for some people. Women have ALOT more leeway to look pretty than a guy has to look nice. If you can have fun doing it, why not??

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2011-07-09 22:44:24
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