How to Handle an Adversarial Divorce Lawyer?

Answer 1

If you have hired a divorce lawyer, you may have realized that your attorney may be making the conflict between you and your spouse worse. If you wish to reduce the conflict between you and your spouse, you can regain control of the situation by following these steps.

Control Your Anger

You may not have realized that your anger can influence how your attorney acts. Some lawyers believe that the best way to protect his or her client is to fight for them. In the midst of a divorce, you may wish to let your anger overpower your reason. This could make the divorce process harder. In addition, it could cause your lawyer to act in a different way towards your spouse. When you deal with your attorney, you should get rid of your anger in the best way that you know how. Try to be reasonable. By doing so, your lawyer will follow your lead.

Take a More Collaborative Approach

Taking a more collaborative approach to the divorce could also make things simpler. For example, you should explain to your divorce attorney that you wish to work with your spouse as opposed to fighting with your spouse. Tell your lawyer that you think it would be easier if you could come to a decision on all of the major issues with your spouse. Since your divorce lawyer works for you, he or she should be willing to do what you ask. If he or she is not willing to do so, you may want to hire a different lawyer.

Be a Part of the Process

Remember to ask your attorney questions about the communications between your lawyer and the courts. You should ask for copies of anything that is filed. If you find inflammatory language, you have the right to remove it.

Take Responsibility

You need to understand that you are responsible for all of your lawyer's actions. You should also understand that it is in your best interest to make sure that your lawyer understands his or her job. His or her job is to promote the relationship with you and your spouse. It is not your lawyer's job to make the divorce harder than it already is. You should also avoid being intimidated by your lawyer's area of expertise. Even though it is his or her job to understand the legal side of a divorce, you are the person that best understand you and your spouse.

When you and your spouse are willing to cooperate, you will be able to solve visitation rights, child custody issues, and the division of marital assets easier. Conflict does not have to be involved. You should explain to your lawyer that he or she needs to follow your instructions in order to keep the conflict to a minimum.