The stud the piercer put in it should be long enough to allow for swelling.
Also, if you put a 16g (which is smaller than a 14g) in it, then the hole itself may become smaller but with some work can be stretched back out to a 14g or larger.
No, the barbell is too short and your tongue is swelling. The barbell should always be longer for new piercings due to swelling, contact your piercer to see about getting a longer barbell. If left the tongue will swell to a point that will cause the barbell ball to be pulled into the tongue, get on some ice to control the swelling and contact your piercer.
Typically, when you first get your tongue pierced, a longer tongue barbell, such as 16mm or 18mm, is used to allow for swelling. After the swelling subsides, you can switch to a shorter barbell of around 12mm. It is important to consult with your piercer for the most appropriate size for your individual anatomy.
That is based on the tongue size ( not all tongues are created equally ) the thicker the tongue the longer the barbell. This is to make room for swelling. Your professional body piercer will check your tongue and size you for the right barbell to do the job. Two weeks after the piercing is done the swelling will have eased off and a shorter barbell can be put into the piercing to avoid doing dental damage.
Go to your piercer ASAP. Sounds like your jewelry is too small/tight. Your piercer will be able to put in a longer piece of jewelry if it isn't really bad yet.
Go to your piercer when the swelling goes down and they'll change it if its ready.
Its longer than what you would normally wear in it because it has to allow for swelling. Don't worry about your gag reflex. Tongues arent pierced that far back and the bar wont be nearly long enough to trigger it. Go to a reputable piercer and you wont have any problems! They know what they're doing!
The barbell is probably too short and isn't accommodating the swelling. Go to your piercer and ask them to change it out to something longer.
You clearly have a swelling issue and the jewellery is not allowing room for swelling. So off you go to see your local professional body piercer to get longer jewellery to resolve your problem. Then you need to take something orally to help with the swelling ibuprofen, Advil, Midol and crushed Ice.
If the jewellery is sized correctly to account for swelling and you are following your aftercare guide you were provided with, the stud should be OK. If you have swelling causing the stud to embed it's self into your lip then you need to get in to see your piercer asap and get a longer stud put in till you clear the swelling stage of the healing process.
Of course you can, the only difference from someone with a longer tongue is that the piercing would have to be a bit closer to the end of your tongue. Other then that it doesn't change anything.
When I got my lip pierced, they already had the jewelry with them, because they have to use a special, longer stud to accomodate swelling. Perhaps if you brought you're own ball(s), they would screw those onto the stud instead of the regular ones.
It is common for a tongue to be swollen for 3-5 days after getting pierced. If the swelling persists beyond this timeframe or if you experience excessive pain or difficulty swallowing, it is recommended to consult with a healthcare professional.