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It is also quite normal to take a more holistic approach to missing your abuser. After all, it is normal for long term prisoners to miss jail. The important thing is that you don't act on the feeling and go back, unless some serious, well validated change has happened. = answer = I wish it weren't so, but I think it is inevitable. One invests a lot in someone so difficult to be with. It's hard to let go of the dream, especially when you have fought for it maybe? It's been 5 months for me now. Zero contact with my ex N. It still hurts now and again, but those times are much fewer and farther in between. I am gaining clarity and acceptance. It will get better. You are grieving and that is a process that is normal. Allow yourself to grieve, but in that grief do not go back to the abusive relationship. I too was emotionally abused by my ex boyfriend and it has been one year since the relationship ended...I can say that I don't miss him nearly as much as I used to. My life has taken a 360 since the end. I also fill the voids knowing God loves me more than anyone and that has made a HUGE difference in my life. God Bless It is normal to miss the GOOD sides of your abuser.

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