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I admire you for realizing there is a problem and that you have taken partial blame and that's one darn good start. There is only one road you can walk down ... right to a psychiatrist ... BOTH OF YOU! Life is truly so intricate and all of us pack some garabage behind our butts (some worse than others.) Most of us do the best we can, but a smart person, if the problem is a serious one, will seek professional help. Both of you are out of control now and it's only going to get worse. Seek the help and if she isn't willing to join you for counseling then it's time to move on. Good luck Marcy

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Can a man from non-abusive upbringing become an abuser if abused by a partner who grew up in an abusive home with no therapy at all?

it is possible


She got abused when she was smallso she abused him?

Yes, abuse is definitely something that is a learned behavior. That's not to say that everyone that is abused will become abusive but there is definitely a correlation between abusers being abused themselves. It's sad because in so many cases the victim becomes the abuser.


Why does leaving an abusive relationship hurt even though you're making an improvement in your life?

Because love and pain become one in the same when you have been abused. You may eel as if you failed some how. You did not. Speak to God, Meditate, do some yoga if you get in touch with you, the pain will leave.


How an abusive parent affect a child?

Data shows that a child who is abused will in turn become an abuser later in life. The life of an abused child is affected his/her entire life.


How does someone become abusive?

anyone can become abusive by being abused themselves or being stressed out really bad. they can have problems that eats them up inside and without warning are ready to take it out on anyone who comes at them wrong.


Type of relationship that can become abusive?

I am sure there are lots of ways a normal relationship can become abusive but there is one that sticks in my mind: A serious relationship. It is because if you are mainly the girl in a relationship (it is mostly the girl playing the victim and the guy playing the abuser) you are more into love than he is so therefore you push yourself into that serious relationship. As he knows you pushed yourself into the relationship he thinks he can control you now and since he knows it is serious he thinks that you won't run away because you love him.


Is it possible that the role of the abuser and the abused change in a relationship and if so is there a chance for those people to survive together?

Abuse victims can, in retaliation, become abusive towards their tormentor. Most certainly they do change. How can they not? With an abuser it is all about power and control and used correctly it's a wonderful tool in business, but most humans don't know how to master this and become straight abusers. No, there is no hope of surviving together and I wouldn't want to stay with anyone that abused me mentally or physically. Abusers are the last to know that they have an abusive personality, so they will not seek out help and become more enraged if it's suggested to them. I would move on from such a relationship and don't waste the rest of your life.


After being in a verbally abusive relationship does the victim often become the abuser in her next relationship?

It does often happen that people will learn how to get their way through verbal aggression, from their own experiences of being verbally abused. Life is an endless learning experience, but sometimes people learn the wrong things. Answer I think it COULD happen but I think it would be the exception and not the rule. Victims in these kinds of situations are usually not abusive types of people - that's why they are victims. If it is an adult who grew up in a verbally abusive environment they may be the victim for a while and then finally snap and turn the tables and become the abuser but I think in most circumstances the victim would not become the abuser in the next relationship.


Why should you care about child abuse?

Child abuse is not only wrong but it can scar the children for life. They can become horrified by people, even their own parents because they were being abusive. If you were a child that was being abused, you probably wouldn't like it.


What happens to a women including their personality and their identity who stay in an abusive relationships?

If a woman gets abused in a relationship alot of mental things happens and it changes your personality it is a terrible thing to go through. You can have PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) after. Your attitude just completely changes some girls can become stronger from it some can become weaker and let every guy walk all over them. Make sure if you see signs of a guy who may be abusive get out asap no matter how much you care because it'll only hurt you.


Why do you hit people like your ex hit you and take on their behaviors even though you totally believe they are wrong. How is it that their behaviors become your behaviors that you try to get rid of?

First off 'ex' means the relationship is over! You should not even be near this person who is abusive and it's time you moved on in your life. In relationships where one is abusive it is human instinct to protect oneself and some abused victims will either stay and take that abuse silently; fight along with the abuser or leave. If you decide to stay in the relationship and have the strength to stand up to the abuser then you sink to the bottom of the barrel because you are fighting with survival instincts. Get out of this relationship!


Why do abusive men play on your insecurities?

They know where your insecurities are because THEY THEMSELVES are overflowing with them. Inevitably they're going to become familiar with them and become naturals at using them..because they are jerks, abusive men are insecure..you need to run

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