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What else can I help you with?
Can a man from non-abusive upbringing become an abuser if with a partner who grew up in an abusive home with no therapy at all?
It is highly unlikely that man who does not have an abusive personality will become an abuser if their partner grew up in an abusive home and refuses help. Good men know they should never hit a woman which in some cases can lead to male abuse by a woman. The stress of being around an abusive person be it verbally or physical abuse is bound to have effects on the non abusive partner, but most men will only take so much and have the opportunity of leaving the relationship.
If a controlling verbally abusive man gets a different partner will he exhibit the same behaviors with the new partner as with the old one?
Yes, unless he has been through counseling or therapy.
How can a woman with a history of abuse dissuade herself of the misconception that her present non-abusive partner will be abusive so that she does not sabotage the potentially healthy relationship?
Abusive behavior directed at a non-abusive partner isn't triggered by any misconception that her partner will be abusive. The abusive behavior is more like an immediate, reflexive defensive act against even the slightest hint or suggestion that a hurtful action may be forthcoming from the "nonabusive" partner, and all this according to a very negative and even paranoid interpretation by the woman of her non-abusive partner's behavior. And then she may never recognize or acknowledge her own abusive behavior unless by some crisis or extraordinary instant of enlightenment she finally sees her behavior as it is. But that isn't enough. She couldn't correct her "misconception" by her self, but by steadfastly and steadily working through the problem in therapy. Some abusers adamantly deny doing any of their abusive acts and will likedly never change. The victims of prolonged, persistent, and sadistic abuse often experience Post Traumatic stress Disorder (PTSD) and other, related, reactions. You need professional help to overcome these after-effects. Joining an online or offline support group also helps. I think you and your partner both need counseling. Especially you. If you have any kids, they need it as much as you do. That is probably the only way to get over your fear. You probably won't be able to do it on your own. It's not your fault, it's just the way the mind works. I totally know how this woman feels..... She must go and seek professional help, to help restructure the way she sees things...or else the fear will dictate her life. I wish her the best and hope that past abusers will not ruin her life. Remind her that she does not need to be ashamed to go for counceling....It part of the process to healing. c.
You treated your partner badly and she left?
Well, only you know what you did and how unforgivable it was. If there was any chance of its being abusive, then you'll need to let her go for good. Work on changing your values and get behavioral therapy before taking on a new relationship.
How do you fix an abusive relationship if you want to stay?
Lots and lots of therapy, both individual and couples' therapy. The better way to fix an abusive relationship is to get out and cut your losses now. More than likely, it will not get better. You deserve more.
What are the benefits to sex therapy?
The benefits of sex therapy include building a more trusting relationship with one's partner and to erase bad memories from the past. Boredom can also be cured from this therapy.
Is it abusive to swear at your spouse several times in a long-term relationship?
No, minor verbal attacks are not generally considered abusive. Try to get into couple's therapy. If you have grown children, maybe they could help you talk about professional help.
Is it normal for women to be abusive?
It is not normal... No-one should be abusive wether they're male or female. If they are you should try to get that person help like "Anger Therapy" or just stay clear of that person and try not to get hurt. Sincerely, ME
Would you leave your partner if he or she threatned to commit suicide in an event of a breakup?
That is a serious question. Do you want to be with them? If so, you need to speak with your partner about getting therapy of some sort. If you aren't interested in spending any more of your life with this person as your partner, I personally feel, that staying with them out of pity or fear is inappropiate for both of you. If it is an abusive (any form)or toxic relationship, it is imperative for you to get out sooner than later. If you are in true fear that your partner would harm themself then speak with someone that cares for them (a family member, clergy, friend, etc.) and make sure they are aware of this person's threat. This way you are safe and the partner can get help. I wish you the best of luck.
What sites answers questions on transference where a person sees in a partner the suppressed memories of a mentally abusive deceased father transferring that hatred on to the partner?
Sites won't help you on this one. If the person transferring their hatred onto the partner refuses to go for therapy, then the partner that is the victim needs to seek therapy to understand how to handle this problem. You don't have to have a mental issue to seek logical advice from a professional. When my mother had Dementia and refused to speak to me (I was her caregiver for years) I went to a psychologist to get his opinion on whether I was handling things the right way. After all it was my mother and now she was simply a shadow of her former self. Dementia or not, I certainly didn't want to hurt my mother. The psychologist thought I was doing a pretty good job of handling things, but gave me additional tools to help me.
What should you do if sex is terrible with your partner?
I'd suggest looking into the possibility of you both having sex therapy.
How do you tell to your love one that she has borderline personality?
This would be pretty tough to do ... but, if you join your loved one in a few partner therapy sessions, some characteristics of borderline P.D. might be able to be discussed with him/her during those sessions. It would be far better to set limits, which you might need for your own mental health, than to try to "fix" your partner, especially if your partner is resistant to therapy.
