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A breakup may come out of nowhere for the dumpee, but not so for the dumper. Usually a few weeks or even months prior to breaking up, the dumper has been privately going through a drawn out process of letting go of their feelings for you. The dumper finally does break up with you when guilt and nostalgia no longer makes them motivated to stay in a relationship with you.

A person chooses to leave a relationship not because they're insecure about their feelings for you, but because they know that they don't have the feelings for you they need to want to continue to be in a relationship with you. People finally leave a relationship when they believe that they have greater potential for personal happiness by being single and being open to other relationships, rather than staying in the one they are currently in.

It's not what you want to hear and it's probably not what your ex would ever tell you. It's also healthier for you that he broke up rather than to string you along or treat you as though you've 'trapped' him and act resentful towards you while staying in the relationship.

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17y ago

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